A woman whose cancer treatment left her unable to conceive has welcomed a baby after her bridesmaid stepped in as a surrogate mother. Emma Smuts-Muller has been friends with Laura Donohoe for 25 years but says they are closer than ever after Laura's selfless deed.
Emma's hopes of conceiving were dashed when she received a breast cancer diagnosis in September 2019 and the treatment affected her fertility. But Laura stepped in after she was diagnosed with breast cancer in September 2019 and had to undergo treatment which affected her fertility.
However, thanks to Laura, who stepped in as surrogate just weeks after being Emma's bridesmaid, Emma is now the proud mum of Ella.
“Laura and I have always had an amazing connection with each other since we met at school,” 39-year-old Emma told the Mirror. “My husband Thomas and I had realised just how ready we were to have a baby, but after having breast cancer that decision was taken away from us. I will never be able to repay Laura for what she’s done for my family and it’s brought us even closer together.”
In May 2019, Emma - who lives near Birmingham and works as a chief of staff for West Midlands Police - married Thomas, 43, with Laura, 39, a bridesmaid. Emma had a miscarriage shortly after returning from her honeymoon in Lake Como and suffered more heartache when her father Terry was diagnosed with leukaemia before Emma found a mass in her right breast that September. Scans soon confirmed the diagnosis of breast cancer.
“I’d had some soreness that I’d initially put down to being pregnant, but when I noticed the changes in my breast I had an instant gut feeling that it was something bad,” Emma recalls. "Thomas and I had been on a massive high after the wedding, and to get pregnant so quickly it felt like everything was going to plan, but to be dealt so many devastating problems one after the other was really difficult for our family.
“I just felt myself go into fight mode. I tried to not think too far into the future because it would have been too overwhelming. I knew I had no option but to get on with life.”
After undergoing eight cycles of chemotherapy, Emma had a mastectomy in April 2020 which removed her right breast as well as the cancerous tumour, before two weeks of radiotherapy. Emma had been offered IVF before starting her treatment but, despite successfully freezing 19 embryos, it became clear that it wouldn’t be an option for Emma to carry one of them herself.
Emma says: “Because my breast cancer was linked to hormones, I had ovarian suppression treatment. I was also told I need to take tamoxifen - which I am on for 10 years - to stop the cancer returning. Due to the previous treatment, and the fact tamoxifen stops your ovaries working, I began to go into the menopause. Doctors also don’t allow you to get pregnant on tamoxifen, and due to my age, I would have potentially been too old to carry my own child once I stopped taking the medication.”
Emma and Thomas began to explore the possibility of using a surrogate to conceive, then one night Laura, who has two daughters aged seven and 11 with her husband Rob, came over to their house and told them she would be willing to carry their child.
“She just dropped it out there that she would consider being our surrogate, which took us both massively by surprise,” says Emma. “However, due to the coronavirus pandemic the plans were put on hold for a few months, and despite having such a long time to mull it over she didn’t change her mind. I was so grateful to her.”
In February 2021, Laura was implanted with one of Emma and Thomas’s embryos.
“When she sent the picture of the positive test through, we were so shocked - but really delighted,” says Emma. “We did this part of the fertility treatment with a private clinic but the doctors there told us there was only a 20% chance of it working due partly to my age and us using a surrogate, so I had prepared for the worst.”
On November 3, Ella was born with Emma by Laura’s side as she went through labour.
“Ella was 12 days overdue, so she did keep us waiting - however, she was definitely worth the wait,” says Emma. “Laura was very clear with her own children that she was just helping myself and Thomas out, and they really understood that.
“I never had any worries that Laura would bond with Ella and find it difficult to give her over to us. We don’t know yet when we will tell Ella how she was born, but it’s such a positive experience however we describe it. Most of all, we want her to understand what a miracle she is.”
Emma now faces a yearly mammogram and speaks to her oncologist every six weeks to make sure the cancer hasn’t returned. But despite all that, she is enjoying being a mum.
She adds: “After coming through such a difficult time, Thomas and I finally have something positive to focus on. Laura is an incredible human being for carrying Ella for us.”
Breast Cancer Now support and fund research into the condition. For more information, see breastcancernow.org.
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