Earlier this month, Dolly Parton surprised many people by requesting that her name be withdrawn from the nomination ballot for the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, claiming that she should not be considered because she has yet to produce a rock album.
Unlike the beloved country star, a number of performers with no experience in rock music have made strange and often startling forays into the rock genre. For your listening pleasure (or grief, depending on your masochism level), here is our selection of what might be the 10 weirdest rock covers of all time.
Judy Garland Singing “The Purple People Eater”: The iconic star went over the wrong rainbow in trying to get a handle on Sheb Wooley’s 1958 novelty rock tune. Garland prefixed her song with a rambling monologue about then-popular horror flicks before steamrolling through the tale of “the one-eye, one-horned flying purple people eater.”
Frank Sinatra Singing “Mrs. Robinson”: Simon & Garfunkel’s haunting song about emotional isolation was mucked up by Sinatra in 1969 with a ring-a-ding-ding big band arrangement and dumb rewriting of the lyrics that included a switch from “Jesus” to “Jilly” (a shoutout to Sinatra pal, restauranteur Jilly Rizzo) and the crass inquiry “So, how’s your bird, Mrs. Robinson?”
Jim Nabors Singing “Listen to the Band”: Well, golly, the one-time Gomer Pyle turned up the volume on his baritone in 1969 to desecrate the Michael Nesmith-penned Monkees rock standard. Nesmith reportedly was unaware of this recording until many years later, but by then the damage was already done.
Raquel Welch Singing “Aquarius/Let The Sunshine In”: In 1969, The Fifth Dimension scored a hit by combining the songs “The Age of Aquarius” and “Let the Sunshine In” into a single tune. The following year, Raquel Welch borrowed the concept for her TV special “Raquel!” However, the production number designed to highlight Welch’s cover was…well, if you never saw it before, fasten your seat belt for a trip back to the Decade That Good Taste Forgot:
Barbara Eden Singing “Spinning Wheel”: Also in 1970, the former “I Dream of Jeannie” star wanted to show off her rock music abilities (among other things) in this gyrating cover of the Blood, Sweat & Tears classic. While Eden’s vocalizing never captures the grittiness of the original recording, her visual performance is certainly an ideal treat for pre-teen boys and jaded middle-aged men.
Sandy Duncan and Paul Lynde Singing “Bad, Bad Leroy Brown”: Another pit stop in the hell of 1970s kitsch television was this riff on the Jim Croce anthem, with campy funnyman Lynde interrupting the music to drop one-liners with gut-wrenching thuds. They don’t make stuff like this anymore – thank God.
Bert Parks Singing “Let Em In”: For reasons that will probably never be properly explained, someone thought it was a good idea to pause the 1976 Miss America pageant telecast, so Bert Parks could do a cover of Paul McCartney’s “Let 'Em In” with three male dancers backing him. No one remembers who was crowned Miss America that year, but fans of bad music remember Parks’ astonishing number.
Alvin and the Chipmunks Singing “Everybody Have Fun Tonight”: The squeaky-voiced cartoon characters had previously released albums based on Beatles songs and movie musical scores, but for this episode of their TV show, they turned their attention to the Wang Chung tune. Perhaps that wasn’t the best idea.
Matthew Morrison Singing “A Little Less Conversation”: In this episode of “Glee,” Morrison’s Will Schuester brings in a Mariachi band, dresses like a matador and sings Elvis Presley’s “A Little Less Conversation” in English and Spanish while two of his students dress like bulls and pretend to charge him. Even by the tacky “Glee” standards, this was a true jaw-dropper.
the_miracle_aligner Singing “Never Gonna Give You Up”: Have you ever thought what it would be like to be Rick-Rolled in Old English? A performer calling himself “the_miracle_aligner” has produced a number of rock favorites in archaic versions of living languages, including this galumphing translation of the Rick Astley favorite – which includes one of the dullest music videos of all time, but we’ll save discussion of that for another article.
Photo: Screen shot of Matthew Morrison singing “A Little Less Conversation” in “Glee,” courtesy of 20th Television.