Booze is 10% ethanol, 90% marketing so maybe it’s time to try Dry January

‘Even Alex Jones, the Infowars conspiracy theorist, is rumoured to be releasing a bourbon – called Conspiracy, of course. It’s a sign, if ever there was one, that the celebrity booze brand trend is officially out of control.’ Photograph: Daniel Leal/AFP/Getty Images

I blame Gwyneth Paltrow, myself. The actor turned entrepreneur may not have been the first celebrity to launch a business empire, but the rise of Goop seems to have coincided with a craze for side hustles among the glitterati. Entertainers aren’t content with just entertaining any more – they’re all business moguls, too. Lil Nas X has a skincare line; Selena Gomez has a makeup brand; Jessica Alba has a baby product company; Kim Kardashian sells performance underwear.

While skincare has become a popular celeb business, the biggest grift is probably still booze. By one calculation, there were fewer than 40 celebrity-affiliated booze brands in 2018; now there are reportedly more than 350. I won’t list them all but, to give you a taste, Graham Norton is shilling wine, the Chainsmokers (remember them?) have a Tequila brand, Jamie Foxx has a bourbon, Cameron Diaz has launched a “clean” wine brand that is vegan-friendly. (And thank God for that, eh? I’d been getting really tired of all those meaty wines.)