April might be the cruellest month if you’re a maudlin poet, but for sun-starved British cyclists, that title belongs to March. By mid-March – recall at your peril – the cold and wind had lingered so long it felt like spring would never arrive. Morale was low, work was busy as I adjusted to a new role, and the thought of gearing up in winter kit to brave the aggro drivers and potholes of south-east England seemed barely worth the hassle. Then I remembered an intriguing email that had landed in my inbox a few weeks earlier. Would I like a complimentary stay, it asked, “at a boutique hotel offering premium bike rentals and guided cycling trips in Cyprus?” At first, I dismissed it as too good to be true, but as another wintry squall rattled the window, my defences crumbled. Oh, go on then, I replied – or words to that effect – don’t mind if I do.
The trip was set for late April, but a few days before departure, I noticed strange irregularities in my heartbeat – runs of unsteady beats punctuated by thudding jolts like a cardiac kickstart. Having been investigated for arrhythmia before, I knew the drill and booked with the GP for an ECG. The results showed a few quirks typical of a heart adapted to endurance exercise, but nothing that troubled the doctor, and the cardiologist agreed: no further tests would be needed. The annoying ectopic beats, likely caused by stress or poor sleep, would pass, advised the kindly GP, I just needed to relax. What better way to follow doctor’s orders than a four-day getaway in the sun?
Having signed up on a nerve-frayed whim, I’d done minimal research on the destination. Noting that the average high in Cyprus in April was 22ºC was good enough. My photographer partner and I arrived late at night and made the 20-minute taxi ride from Larnaca airport to the Agora Hotel under cover of darkness. Dropped off on a narrow cobbled street, we stepped into the hotel’s marble-floored lobby, where the night receptionist swiftly brought us cold white wine and showed us to our room. Inside, we found a silver platter of fresh fruit, more wine, soft jazz playing on a retro-style radio, and a vast bed adorned with welcome notes tied with dried flowers. We had, very emphatically, arrived. Being more familiar with no-frills hotels and Airbnbs, I was out of my comfort zone – but also, as I let myself topple backwards into a sea of cushions, exceptionally comfortable.
Morning sunshine revealed the Agora in all its sparkly charm. ‘Boutique’ made sense now: just 18 rooms, arranged around a central, open-air pool. Such was the intimacy that it felt less like a hotel, more like staying at the seasonal residence of a fabulously rich friend – an impression that wasn’t so far from the truth, as I was about to learn. After a made-to-order breakfast – no elbowing around the buffet toaster here – I asked at reception about borrowing a bike. Moments later, a suave 30-something man in white chinos and a crisp, open-neck shirt appeared, and called out my name with such enthusiasm I thought he must know me. Who was this, I wondered – hardly dressed like a cycling guide, but surely too young to be the proprietor.
I was wrong on both counts. Aleksander Eng is the owner and the lead cycling guide at the Agora Hotel. Which only makes sense once you’ve heard his story. Aleks is a Danish entrepreneur who in his early 20s made a savvy investment in nascent high street chain Joe & The Juice. After cashing out in 2015, he needed a way to expend his boundless energy – and cash – so threw himself into competitive cycling. On a training trip to Cyprus in 2018, Aleks stumbled upon a derelict hotel on the site of the former marketplace – or agora – of the ancient village of Pano Lefkara. A vision began to form. Alongside his partner Emily, they set to work transforming the site into a heaven on earth for the more discerning type of sun-seeking cyclist. For now, though, they’d have to make do with me.
Suits you, sir
I’ve almost forgotten the offer of ‘premium bike rental’ as Aleks ushers me along the poolside to the far corner of the hotel, where I notice a pair of handsome road bikes resting against the wall like glamorous stage dressing. The Agora’s rental fleet could not be further from your typical holiday hire: eight immaculate Factor O2s, custom-painted in white-and-terracotta to match the striped poolside loungers. Lounging rights will have to be earnt, though, because first we have peaks to summit. Aleks, having started this project in 2019, has had plenty of time to explore the local roads, and he assures me I’m in for a treat.
Thanks to the Agora’s location on the edge of the Troodos Mountains, we roll straight out of the hotel and onto traffic-free mountain roads. On the first descent, my heart rate spikes alarmingly – probably just from the adrenaline surge – and I stop to let it settle, cursing my errant ticker’s apparent intent to derail the trip. But from that moment on, it doesn’t miss a beat, and with each new panorama, I can feel my stress flitting away as if on the wings of the butterflies spangling the roadsides. As we head into the Macheiras National Forest Park, the sweet aroma of pine and the even sweeter silence, interrupted only by the occasional screech of a buzzard, make for blissful riding. Not that this is an entirely leisurely type of relaxation – Aleks makes sure of that.
As a guide, the Agora boss is the perfect blend of considerateness and provocation. On each downhill, he leads the way, keeping the pace within the margins of my (limited) descending skills, but as soon as the road tilts upward and I edge ahead, he instinctively retakes the lead. I can’t resist the challenge, and within a few minutes, wordlessly, we’ve entered into a reckless game of anything-you-can-do. On longer, steeper climbs, my lighter frame gives me the edge, but on the flatter sections, Aleks rockets past with a punch I’d need motorised assistance to match. All the while, I’m falling for the Factor O2 beneath me – the dream holiday fling, lighter, nimbler and far sexier than anything I’m accustomed to throwing a leg over at home.
That first ride – 50km with 1,250m of climbing – was just a warm-up. The next two days, guided by Aleks around his favourite routes, are like an intensive heat treatment, rapid-thawing my love for cycling out of its winter doldrums. Cloud cover on day two pegs the temperature to the mid-20s, but on day three the sun blazes with an intensity we experience only a couple of times a year in the UK – which, in April, feels miraculous. We ride nearly 90km with close to 2,000m of ascent, encountering barely a dozen cars and no potholes; the only hazards around here are the occasional lump of scree from rockfalls and views so beautiful they’re distracting.
Poolside pampering
Back at the Agora, we cool off with ice-cold pilsners – handpicked by Aleks from Cyprus’s only microbrewery – and demolish a couple of the restaurant’s freshly made pizzas. After the appetite-stoking ride, they’re not just tasty, they’re manna from heaven. As I order a Dirty Martini digestif, just because it seems fittingly chic, and prepare to slip into the pool, I’m suddenly aware that this is the most relaxed I’ve felt in months. What is it about this place, aside from the obvious pleasures, that so thoroughly soothes the soul? Then it dawns on me: there are no screaming children in the pool. In fact, there are none in the entire hotel. To ensure a serene ambiance, Aleks and Emily made the tough decision, despite having a child of their own, that the hotel would be a no-kids zone. From my arguably selfish perspective as a childless peace-seeker, it seems the greatest policy since Harold Wilson legalised being gay.
As I tip back my head and let my body float on the surface of the pool, all I can see is sky, cloudless and unbelievably blue. My submerged ears detect no splashing, no voices, only my heartbeat, slow and steady. Imperceptibly I drift until my head gently bumps the poolside, and I right myself, taking a final look around, marvelling at how far away that cruel UK March seems now. But I can’t escape the reality: it’s time to go home. “You’re welcome back any time,” Aleks grins from the poolside. I wish I could take him up on it and re-book right now, but I know the Agora is beyond my budget. Still, the best experiences are priceless precisely because they can happen only once – and with that bittersweet resolve, I climb out of the pool and prepare to pack away, along with my salt-stained kit, the treasured memory of a revitalising few days in boutique cycling bliss.
Key information
How to get there
We flew with EasyJet from London Gatwick to Larnaca, which costs from around £120 return. Pano Lefkara is a 20-30-minute taxi ride from Larnaca airport. A return flight from Gatwick emits 1.19 tonnes of CO2.
Where to stay
The Agora Hotel in southern Cyprus is located in Pano Lefkara, famous for its lace and silver handicrafts. Rooms cost from £139 per night: theagorahotel.com. Cheaper B&B options are available locally.
Bike rental
Hiring a Factor O2 from the Agora’s rental fleet costs from £36 per day, depending on the number of days’ rental. Matching Agora kit is available to purchase.
Cycling routes and events
Each November the Agora hosts its own sportive, the Lefkara Classic, a 150km ride with 4,000m of elevation. This year’s takes place on 10 November and entry costs €40. Aleks Eng’s favourite routes are available on the Agora website: theagorahotel.com/cycling.
Off-season cycling climates compared
How spring and autumn temperatures in Cyprus compare with those in two of the most popular off-season cycling destinations.
Temperatures represent average daily highs and lows, in ºC.
