Time for some radical honesty. I’ve spent the last fifteen years of my life going to theme parks on a very regular basis, and I’ve always looked at parades as a bothersome inconvenience. If you want to be more blunt about it, you could say I’ve been a Grinchy hater. They’re loud. They make navigating whatever park you’re in a circuitous challenge for multiple hours, and I’ve just never seen the appeal.
I blame my parents. We never went to parades as a kid, and when the subject came up, they were always very dismissive. At some point, I must have internalized their parade-hating biases and come to the unshakable conclusion that sitting in one place while people walk past you in themed outfits is a dumb waste of time. Well, it turns out I was wrong.
