There is a poignant through-line in Netflix’s new docuseries on Victoria Beckham, if only one can be bothered to look for it. It’s buried beneath a tranche of meticulously considered outfits and showbiz talking heads, inspirational soundbites and relentless “girl boss” speak during the build-up to the former pop star’s biggest ever show at Paris Fashion Week. Nevertheless, it’s there, quietly underpinning every decision and career twist. As we’re taken on a journey from Beckham’s transition from “awkward” theatre kid to Spice Girl to WAG to fashion designer, a sense of deep-rooted unease reveals itself as the consistent underlying theme.
Here is a woman who, on the face of it, has it all: the handsome, ex-football captain husband; the beautiful quartet of children; the successful career; the unimaginable wealth and idyllic country house. But here, equally, is a woman who hasn’t felt comfortable in her own skin in years – if ever. A woman so self-conscious that, by her own admission, she hasn’t felt confident enough to smile in a picture for a quarter century. A woman whose tightly wound drive can be traced inexorably back to an aching need for approval. “I desperately wanted to be liked,” she says of feeling like an outcast at school. But even winning the respect of the notoriously exclusionary fashion industry doesn’t feel enough to sate the void that, as any good therapist will tell you, can never be filled by external validation. “Who are you trying to prove this to?”, husband David asks her at one point. Everyone, it would seem.
