Let's just check the stock market, which I haven't checked in hours, and oh my god, why is everything deep in the red? What happened? Did a nuke just get set off in London? Did that dumb boat get stuck in the Suez Canal again? Did aliens come down from Mars and say we're all getting rounded up to pick frugleberries for their pleasure?
No? (someone whispers in my ear) He did what? (whispering continues) Didn't every single economist say a trade war was a stupid-ass idea given the world's economies are global economies? (whispers) They did and he didn't care? (whispers) So, apparently, U.S. President Donald J Trump, a man who's declared bankruptcy a whopping seven times, tanked the markets because he imposed a 25% tariff on both Canadian and Mexican goods because, well, reasons that aren't readily apparent.
And because of those tariffs, and the retaliatory tariffs those countries plan to impose on the United States, and the retaliatory tariffs President Trump said he'd push through because of those retaliatory tariffs, the markets freakin' tanked and threaten to put the world into a global recession. Again, all because reasons. And then, after all this truly staggering stupidity, the President's Commerce Secretary had to admit that these tariffs might not actually go into effect.
