Nicole Lawder was never supposed to become an ACT parliamentarian.
When she started to express an interest in politics she was interested in federal politics.
"The powers that be told me I had to run in the local election first for name recognition. I said 'but what if I get in?', they said 'don't worry you won't'," Ms Lawder said.
But 12 years later she has given her final speech in the ACT Legislative Assembly. She is not recontesting her seat of Brindabella.
Ms Lawder was elected to the Assembly in 2013 when she filled the casual vacancy left following the resignation of former opposition leader Zed Seselja.
She won by eight votes.
"When your party tells you that every vote counts this is so true. Eight votes is such a slim margin. Every single vote is important. My family referred to it as my Stephen Bradbury moment," she said.
In her valedictory speech, Ms Lawder revealed she agonised over the decision to contest the countback, saying she was scarred by the campaign. She said her fellow Liberal candidates often excluded her from their campaigning efforts.
"I think I was the token woman on a ticket of four other men in my electorate and I was unsuccessful in that first campaign," she said. "In my first campaign there were three chosen candidates that it was obvious the party wanted to get elected.
"These three would be told to go to Lanyon and I would be told to go to Farrer.
"In retrospect, I felt that I was never intended to get elected. There were the three golden boys who were always intended to get elected and their plan worked."
Ms Lawder's foray into politics started following her brother's shooting.
Her brother, econometrics lecturer Dr Lee Gordon-Brown, was shot by a student at Monash University in 2002. She reflected on former prime minister's John Howard's decision to tighten gun laws in Australia.
She was in the public service at the time but moved to the community sector, working in the disability and homelessness sector.
Ms Lawder said the issues that became close to her during her 11 years in the Assembly included water quality, Tuggeranong issues and working with the deaf community.
She also spoke about the horrific murders of Tara Costigan and Bradyn Dillon and said this had brought about change.
Ms Lawder described herself as a "small l" Liberal and said this had, at times, caused issues in her party.
"I've often said that I'm about as far to the left of the Liberal party as you can get without being Labor," she said.
"Consequently, I struggled with internal party politics at times and I suspect they struggle with me at times too."
Ms Lawder also expressed fear at what she believed was a "declining respect for our democratic institutions", citing ministers not responding to constituent letters.
"We have people who get elected who seem to have no respect for our democratic institutions ... I believe we should fight to protect the institutions that are important and that work for us," she said.
"We must be respectful. Inappropriate politicisation and disrespect of the parliament, I believe, is appalling. It's a move to performative politics."
Ms Lawder, who is 62, revealed she would be doing a PhD at the Australian National University.
