The moment I knew: He stepped out of the shower and into a robe – he looked pretty handsome

‘I’d cooked a roast and he always tells the story that there were 17 different vegetables’: Paul Heath (left) and David McLean in Melbourne. Photograph: Guardian Design/Paul Heath and David McLean

We met in 1998, at a health and relationship course run back then by the Gay Men’s Health Centre in Melbourne. I saw David across the crowded room at a drinks session afterwards and slowly made my way around to talking with him. We were both in our mid-30s, and I’ve always gone for those tall skinny guys. We chatted easily and before he left I scribbled down my number.

He rang a few weeks later on a Saturday night, apparently figuring I wouldn’t be home and that he’d just leave a message. When I picked up, I think he was a little thrown. He said something like: “Hi, um, hang on a sec, oh fuck, I’ve gotta turn the rice down!” And I thought, this is my sort of guy – Saturday night at home cooking rice, what’s not to love.