Is there anything worse than getting a little lost in the London Underground? Yes, as it happens – being trapped in that same underground’s demonic otherworld twin and having a bipedal little ratman shambling towards you about to tear your throat out. The monsters in Sorry We're Closed may be low-poly, but are still disturbingly detailed thanks to slick texture-work that echoes the biblical visuals of High Renaissance fresco painting.
But it’s not over yet. Playing as Michelle – rocking iconic bright blue hair and a pink fur coat combo – I can switch up the situation. With a snap of her fingers, her third eye opens, the jagged spikes and rusted floors giving way to the grimy-yet-normal metro we know, and the demon’s form is cast in neon-silhouette, a glowing heart revealed within. Aiming down sights with an equally demonic pistol (the hellhound – which growls on reload), I blast the heart, a dinging noise ringing out as it's shattered, and it’s stunned in a keyframe pose briefly as another heart appears. Like pinball – bling, bling, bling – I light it up, a “perfect” appearing on screen as it tumbles to the ground. That’s heartbreak.
