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Ruth Mosalski

'She is ceasing to be the person she was' Neil Kinnock's poignant honesty on his wife's Alzheimer's diagnosis

Former Labour leader Lord Kinnock has opened up about his wife Glenys’ battle with Alzheimer’s. He described the former politician as a "highly articulate, immensely lively, funny woman with some style, a brilliant cook, wonderful mother and grandmother," but said she is "ceasing gradually to be the person she used to be".

He said his wife, a former teacher was MEP for Wales from 1994 to 2009 and then served as Minister of State for Europe and Minister of State for Africa and the United Nations. The couple's son Stephen is MP for Aberavon.

Asked during a Talk TV interview about the toughest part of her diagnosis, Lord Kinnock said: "The inevitability of the knowledge that the change is going to continue. They are ceasing very gradually to be the person that they have been. Now your main concern is for what that means to them, here is a highly articulate, immensely lively, funny woman with some style, a brilliant cook, wonderful mother and grandmother and in all of those areas of her life, she has lost capability and of course, Glenys was one of those people who prided herself enormously on her capability.

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"She's fine in many ways. Obviously, Alzheimer's sufferers don't get better. But we are lucky that she's retained some of her sense of merriment. I can give you an example. We went to supper at Rachel's, our daughter's, yesterday evening with Rachel and Stuart and the kids. I poured some wine for Glenys and she looked at it, she looked at me and then she picked it up and put it close to her eye communicating as she's done for decades. 'God, this isn't enough to wash my eye out with'. Stu and Rachel were falling about, it really was a moment of sheer merriment and that helps Glenys a lot and it certainly helps us.

"She gets away with immensely challenging situations, sometimes very dangerous situations, with this hint of mischief, which was a special magic. For that to be ebbing, gradually being erased by this disease, makes it difficult for her, sometimes it makes her extremely frustrated and it is a challenge to me, but I deal with it. That's what you do, you do that with love. It's as simple as that."

Asked how he was coping, Lord Kinnock said: "Well, I suppose I could rather tritely put it that she has supported me for 50 years and I've been helping her out for five. So, I've got a fair way to go to catch up. But it doesn't really work like that, as people who deal with the reality of dementia will tell you, you cope with it in a way that is near to your normality, as achievable if you're very fortunate and secure in your housing, your family are understanding and supportive.

"That really does make it hardly a burden at all, frankly, for those things that are absent. If people are lonely, or if people are stranded or they don't see family, friends, neighbours they don't feel they're part of a community. It can be quite devastating and we deal with it and I think we deal with it very well. But we have assets in that including the love of our family, which makes it so much easier for us than it is for millions of others."

Watch the interview here.

The politician said his wife was diagnosed after a family holiday to Kefalonia in 2016. "I noticed to an extent that I hadn't before, that she was slipping words, showing a degree of confusion, which could be put down to the fact that we're in a strange environment and so on and then shortly after we came back from holidays, my son-in-law Stuart, who would see her every week, every 10 days, not daily as I was, said, 'Do you think Glenys ought to have a chat with somebody because it appears to me that she is getting slightly confused' and so we proceeded on that basis.’

"We've got a marvellous memory service in Islington, and Camden with great doctors, wonderful professional nurses and they had a chat to Glenys to go through some questions and so on. After all that, in February 2017 she was diagnosed as having Alzheimer's. She took it with equanimity. She was very grown up about it. To an extent she rode the blow better than I did, but we knew we had to get on with things and try to make arrangements around it. And that's what we did. And of course, we are immensely fortunate that we've got the kind of resources that enable us to have really wonderful women helping Glenys out for four or five hours a day, every day, which takes a huge weight off me, massively helps Glenys and helps the whole family. For people who haven't got those resources, life I'm certain, well I know, is very, very difficult and very challenging."

Labour leader Neil Kinnock and his wife Glenys cast their votes at Pontllanfraith, South Wales - April 1992. (Mirrorpix)

It is Dementia Action Week and Lord Kinnock was asked by host Tom Newton Dunn whether he felt a cure would come in time to assist her. "There is a certainty about the advance of science that eventually treatments will be found for just about every condition. The problem is with dementia, with Alzheimer's is nobody is certain about the origin. What causes it where does it comes from? There are life conditions that we suppose can contribute but Glenys has always been fit, slim, she hasn't smoked for 40 years. She's not a heavier drinker and never has been. She's had a balanced diet still has. So, many of those contributory factors are evident in her case, as they are in some of the cases but far from all cases. So, if they don't really know or can't really identify causes then it's really difficult to discover cures.

"There are marvellous research programmes being undertaken all over the world, including in our country, dozens of them probably, the Alzheimer's Society is doing terrific work. As you say it's their action awareness week, this week. And we know that someday, somehow with this massive effort of brilliantly skilled people, and the amount of testing and research that's going on, they will find a way to overcome it. But it's going to be a long way ahead.".

The interview was shown on The News Desk, TalkTV, 7pm Monday to Friday. To get more news from Wales direct to your inbox, subscribe to our newsletters here.

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