Everyone at Netflix must be absolutely fuming today.
They forked out a rumoured $100 million for Prince Harry’s story, and whadda ya know, turns out he accidentally saved all the juiciest gossip for his own book.
Netflix somehow managed to stretch six looong hours out of “H” rehashing everything we’d already heard before, the televisual equivalent of making a silk purse out of a sow’s ear.
Imagine their faces when they discover that up his sleeve, Hazza had an entire pig, some extra bacon, and quite a few absolute bangers. Namely, sex, drugs, and being rocked’n’rolled on the floor by the future king.
William is said to have been mortified by how indiscreet Diana was in her infamous Panorama interview, so in a way he should be grateful to Harry for writing Spare.
No-one’s going to be talking about there being three of us in this marriage now there’s “She treated me like a young stallion” virginity loss tales, cocaine admissions, and details of the two brothers coming to blows.
Ironically for someone who hates the media so much, this is the third time Harry has done a kiss and tell on himself, and it’s definitely the most dramatic, scandalous and revealing.
Nothing is apparently too intimate to include, not even the moment he was told his mother was dead. For someone so insistent on privacy, it’s a confusing move.
This book is going to make a lot of people very happy though. Not Netflix. Or Oprah, come to think of it. But anyone with any interest in what Prince Harry really thinks will be left in no doubt after reading it.
And those who couldn’t care less, or who tired of his schtick long ago, can enjoy it too – because after this, surely there can be nothing left to say.
