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Bored Panda
Renan Duarte

“I Hate To Do It”: Man’s Letter To Wife On How He Can’t Be A Husband Sends Internet Into A Frenzy

A man’s hilariously honest letter to his wife about why he can’t be a husband is going viral for its unexpected ending.

On October 22, a perfume and beauty influencer named Joy shared a post on X with the caption, “Ladies… choose yourself. I woke up to this nonsense after almost 11 years of marriage.”

The letter, which has been viewed over 20 million times, was written by her husband Fred. And despite the solemn tone, users were relieved to find out the message was merely a cheeky joke.

A man’s viral honest letter to his wife on why he couldn’t be a husband is sending the Internet into a frenzy

Image credits: joyyunspeakable

Fred first opened the letter by saying, “You mean the world to me. However I owe it to myself as well as you to be completely honest with you. I have to come forward with my truth. I hate to do it this way but it’s now or never because what I’m about to say has to be said.”

He continued, “Tonight on October 22nd 2024 marks opening night for the New York Knicks 24-25 season.”

The man later stated he would be watching the game, which meant he will “not be a husband or a father” for the duration of the show. 

“No I will not watch our shows with you. No I will not get you something sweet,” Fred said. “I will not take the dog out. I will not get the kid in bed either. I will sit on my couch, drink in hand and I will watch the game. That’s it.”

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable

According to the letter, his actions didn’t mean he loved his wife or his child any less but rather, “tonight isn’t about y’all.”

“Just call me if you need me. I look forward to seeing and talking to you later. AFTER the game that is,” he added.

After reading her husband’s letter, Joy texted him, “I gave you almost 12 years of my life just for you to leave me a letter like that ???” to which Fred replied, “I had to be true to myself. Even if it hurt.” 

Many of the comments initially thought the letter would have a very different ending

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable

The replies under the initial X post admitted they first thought Fred was asking for a divorce.

“Not gonna lie I was NOT expecting it had me going the first half,” wrote someone. “Kudos to you both for having a fun marriage and messing with each other. You need to get him back tho and get us a Part 2!” 

Another added, “You could have given me a million guesses on how that letter would end, and I still wouldn’t have seen this coming.”

“You can tell this family is filled with love and jokes man,” read a comment. “I’m crying.”

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable

Joy agreed with many of the comments, writing, “I won’t even lie… he had me nervous at first, then I laughed so hard… this made my morning.”

“Also to piss you guys off more… he picked up food and ice cream on his way home from work,” she later added and posted a video of Fred watching the game. “I’m on the couch talking to him while the game is on. I hope he don’t leave me.” 

While this couple had the opportunity to share a laugh over the letter, many women have expressed concern over their spouse’s decision to prioritize sports games

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable

According to various sites such as Daily Press or OnMilwaukee, it isn’t uncommon for a man to deem a sports game more important than family activities or other prior commitments.

One anonymous user shared her dilemma, saying that while her husband has always been “passionate” about sports, his recent behavior is a cause for concern.

“Now that we are married with children, this passion has become increasingly frustrating to me,” she said. “To watch the games, he will miss activities with our children and me. He’s missed school events, our kids’ sporting events, my birthday and even one of our anniversaries.”

She also added that if the team her husband was cheering for lost, he’d remain in a “bad mood for a few days and be short with all of us” and while he was never physically violent, he would be verbally abusive. 

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable

A stay-at-home mother named Terry shared her frustrations over the same issue.

“What really bugs me is that I was never asked if I minded watching the kids so he can sit on his butt in front of the TV for hours, it is just assumed that he gets to watch the games,” she said. 

“And since my kiddos are so young and they are not gonna quietly sit for those four hours or more, I need to plan an activity.” 

Image credits: joyyunspeakable

After receiving a few replies that touched on those issues, Joy made it clear her husband was different. 

“I hate that yall took something beautiful and made it ugly but I know that misery loves company so this is the last time I’ll say this. My husband works. Cooks cleans, helps with our kid and dog,” she wrote

“Idk what yall are used to but he is not THEM. I am blessed to be a stay at home mom.”

Bored Panda has reached out to Joy for comment.

Image credits: JoyyUnSpeakable
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“I Hate To Do It”: Man’s Letter To Wife On How He Can’t Be A Husband Sends Internet Into A Frenzy Bored Panda
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