As a kid, swimmer Elijah Winnington dreamt of winning gold for Australia at the Commonwealth Games, but he never realised the challenges that could come with it.
The 22-year-old has achieved incredible success, winning three gold medals in Birmingham in 2022 to go with another gold on the Gold Coast in 2018.
Despite the success, Winnington says returning to normality has been challenging for his mental health.
"The first three months after any major competition is probably the hardest, regardless of if you have done well or if you haven't lived up to expectations," he says.
"You have gone from such a high to then you are just back doing the same old grind waking up and going to the pool.
"You kind of sit back and go, 'Oh well, was that all really worth it?'"
Winnington says he has been able to draw on his experiences following the Tokyo Olympics, where he suffered from "severe depression" and "almost quit swimming" after the games.
"What motivated me was thinking about what's next and knowing this isn't it for me — that really helped me get through it," he says.
Winnington says it is an issue that is facing almost every sportsperson.
"Regardless of whether it has been a successful or unsuccessful trip, you are going to come home and face some kind of difficulty," he says.
'I physically couldn't do it'
Lawn bowler Ellen Ryan achieved the "best moment" of her life when she became a dual gold medallist at the 2022 Commonwealth Games.
Five months later, the Goulburn local reveals she has struggled to come to terms with the success she achieved in Birmingham.
"Going back to reality has been a tough one, trying to adapt to the change I have had," she says.
In the final of the women's pairs match against England, the 25-year-old bowled the winning shot during the tiebreaker to claim gold with teammate Kristina Krstic.
Ryan says that moment has had a lasting impact on her.
"I played a bowl under so much pressure but now, in everyday life, I struggle with things that I shouldn't," she says.
"During a social game of golf we had to make the putt to win and I physically couldn't do it. I wanted my teammate to do it."
Ryan says her friends and family are helping her deal with the "rollercoaster ride" she has been on.
"Until you have actually experienced the highs and lows, that is when you can reflect on it and know how you deal with it," she says.
Common challenge for athletes
Professor Rosemary Purcell from Melbourne University's elite sports and mental health team says it is a challenge that many athletes face.
"Anecdotally a number of athletes do talk about struggling with this kind of post-Olympic or post-major-competition blues that it certainly wouldn't be uncommon among elite athletes," she says.
Professor Purcell says the pressure and energy that goes into being a successful athlete makes adjusting to reality difficult.
"The investment of time and physical and mental energy that goes into the preparation for those major competitions, there is almost a spring release at the end of that," she says.
"It is like 'What now? I have devoted so much to this one event, what do I do now?' — especially where there has been success that can be tricky for athletes."
Winnington is back in the pool training for the Olympic Games in Paris in 2024, and is all too aware of the mental health challenges he'll face on his return.
"I think every athlete or high-performance person would be lying in saying that they came home and they were just great and loved life," he says.
"We are human just like everybody else and we have emotions."
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