An Edinburgh student has shared how they hope undergoing top surgery will change their life after years of body dysphoria.
Jay Holanova, 32, told Edinburgh Live they have struggled for years with their identity, after "refusing to wear a dress" from the age of five.
Moving to the capital from the Czech Republic in 2019, Jay explained that the change of scene and language finally allowed them to explore who they were, and make the decision to undergo surgery.
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Now getting ready to study medicine at Edinburgh University, Jay has chosen to opt for a private procedure after being told the NHS waiting list could take another five years.
Speaking about their journey, they said: "I struggled since I remember, I know my mum says the last time she tried to put a dress on me I was five -years-old.
"I was bullied a lot and never fitted in, for example whenever I would do plays I would always go for the male roles.
"I also got really distressed during puberty when my breasts started to grow, that was pretty harsh, but also, my language is very very gendered, I can't talk about myself in the past tense without gendering myself, so it's hard to realise what's going on."
After moving to Edinburgh to live with their partner, Jay shared that the different language and community finally allowed them to explore their identity.
Finally realising they were non-binary and struggling with body dysphoria, Jay made the decision to get top surgery done as soon as possible before beginning their studies.
They added: "Coming to Edinburgh and speaking full-time English it allowed me to see different genders and being in the company of people who are queer and have more experience.
"I met people who were non-binary and it started to allow me to think what I'm feeling, this discontent with myself and my body and the way I present myself is about this. I had a lot of discussions with people who were also gender non-conforming.
"Before I moved I was looking at breast reduction surgery because I didn't know full top surgery was an option, I didn't know it wasn't only possible if I was only full trans not binary trans.
"Now i have the support, from my partner and my flatmate, I have the support to go for it and also, since I was able to put name to it the dysphoria has been getting worse, i will look in the mirror and start getting anxious because I don't see myself in it.
"I got onto a waiting list last year but the waiting time is so long, I can't imagine waiting another four of five years as I'm not exactly the youngest anyway."
With the final costs of surgery expected to work out at over £10,000, Jay launched a GoFundMe page to try and help with the additional finances.
Saving a few thousand themselves, in just a short while the page has seen nearly £4,000 of donations from friends, family and supportive people across the country.
Jay said: "Whenever I think about it happening I just get very happy, I'm so looking forward to wearing shirts that I like and not being constricted and uncomfortable. It will bring me a lot of content with myself and a lot happier within my own body.
"I was not expecting it and I think it's amazing, I am so grateful to everyone and anyone who donated or shared, a lot of people really surprised me and were so supportive."
