Whenever Major League Baseball decides to stop treating its fans like spent sunflower seed shells and chewed-through bubble gum, it’s going to have to lure them back to ballparks to buy tickets and overpriced everything else.
How about handing out a special gift to cut through the tension?
A custom-edition foam finger would be nice. Instead of the index finger, the middle digit could stick straight up. It would be a good reminder for fans of how little they have mattered during this lockout. You know, in case they somehow forgot.
