A Co Antrim man is channelling his grief following the loss of his beloved wife, who was the "life and soul" to so many, into carrying on her kind and caring legacy.
Amanda Donoghue was just 54 when she lost her short battle with an aggressive form of cancer on July 23 this year. Leaving a huge gap in lives of those she loved, husband Peter is determined to keep her memory alive by helping others, just as she did.
The mum-of-three was the epitome of a generous, kind and caring person and would spend hours on the phone helping others through their problems and was always on hand to offer her support.
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Speaking to Belfast Live, 50-year-old Peter, from Antrim, said he wanted to continue on his wife's caring nature as a tribute to her memory and had found it was something that was helping him cope with his loss in the last few weeks.
"She was a very religious person, she was born again and non denominational and her faith was the strongest thing to keep her going through the cancer," he said.
"She knew she was always going to see God in heaven. She was always looking out for everyone else, sorting every else's problems, always on the phone for hours chatting away. You could never get her off the phone, she just always took everyone's problems on board and sorted them out. She is going to leave a big gap in everyone's lives.
"I am trying my best to keep up her mantle, have those conversations and make sure everybody else is OK."
Amanda first went to see doctors in December last year and Peter said she knew there was something wrong with her body. Experts were doing tests to see if it was cancer and in March of this year she was told she had Uterine leiomyosarcoma, an aggressive form of the disease.
She underwent a hysterectomy on May 10 as well as other treatments but despite there being hope it had helped, doctors broke the devastating news in the middle of July that there was nothing else that could be done.
Amanda, who was also grandmother to Kieran, was just 54 when she passed away at 3.38pm on July 23 surrounded by her family.
"They thought everything was all removed, had a hysterectomy, we thought we would get the surgery over an done with, a bit of radiotherapy and then the road to recovery," said Peter.
"Then at the end of June, this mass had grown back so aggressively and she was in a lot of pain, could not sleep. We just could not believe it when the consultant told us, he initially thought it could be fluid, drain it and then things like chemo again, but he said to us on Thursday 14th at 2.30pm 'I am so so sorry'."
Peter praised the exceptional care Amanda received at the hospital as well as at the Macmillan Unit , in particular Patricia Rogers from the palliative care team who he said was Amanda's angel throughout.
"Ultimately she wanted to get home but just the way she went downhill in the two weeks in Antrim Area Hospital, Patricia got her into Macmillan for the last three or four days of her life and they were absolutely fantastic," he said.
"They are heroes in my mind, they could not have done anything more for her, they were outstanding. The service, care, compassion and love."
He added: "The main thing is we lost Amanda far too early, you always think this happens to other people, you don't expect to plan funerals, or it maybe would have happened when we were older, 70, 80 90. You do not know what is around the corner so you have to treasure every minute you have."
The couple would have been married 17 years on October 22 this year but had been together for more than 22 years after meeting on a night out at the Errigle Inn in Belfast on October 21, 2000.
Another man was trying to chat to Amanda and light her cigarette, but struggling, when Peter stepped in and lit it in one click.
"We say that was the spark that started it, that's how we met, the rest is history" he said.
Amanda, who had her three children Lee, Joel, and Michal from a previous relationship, was originally from the Woodstock Road in Belfast and worked as a shop assistant and in a cafe in Castle Mall, Antrim.
Peter now is focusing his attention on trying to help others and channelling Amanda's behaviour, something he said is helping him with his grief.
"It just gives me comfort, I know I am strong, I am not denying what has happened but I just want to give other people my strength to help them feel better," he said.
"It makes me a nicer person and helps me to get through my grief."
He is now raising money for a special fund at the home where Amanda's mum Stella is a resident, the De La Cour House Comfort Fund.
"Amanda didn't want flowers or anything like that which wouldn't have been of any use to anybody, she wanted money to go to their community fund, it is the De La Cour House Comfort Fund," he said.
"They were struggling last year post Covid and Amnda and I were chatting to the staff and wanted to know what we could do to help. They were planning a Jubilee party for the residents and didn't have enough funds so Amanda had a wee bit of extra money and it helped them and they were so thankful.
"She wanted money to go to De La Cour. We had about 10 days in the hospital with her to plan the funeral and eulogy and things like that."
Peter is also trying to help the rest of the family and is making special pieces for everyone to be able to wear and remember her, making silver pendants with her finger prints.
"They will always have that close to their hearts and remember Mandy, they all knew her as Mandy but I always called her Amanda," he added.
"There is her voice on her voicemail and I said to wee Kieran, see if you are feeling down and want to chat to your granny Mandy, just phone her and hear her voice and leave a wee message if you are feeling sad.
"She had her wee quirks, she was a lovely, generous, caring person. There were 250 at the church and 100 at the grave.
"I sometimes go up to the grave with the patio chair, chat to her, have a cry. She was the life and soul of everyone's life, she made sure everyone else was OK"
To support Peter's fundraising efforts in Amanda's memory, click here to find out more.
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