40 cat Christmas jokes that are purr-fectly hiss-terical

Cat in Christmas tree playing with baubles.

Let’s face it: the meow-st wonderful time of the year wouldn’t be complete without the best cat Christmas jokes.

Of course, packed with top treats and toys, the best advent calendars for cats, can help you (and your fur friend) get into the festive spirit. But before December 1st rolls around, the funniest Christmas cat jokes are the purrr-fect way to help spread some holiday cheer in the lead-up to Big Day.

Any pet parent will know just how funny these fabulous balls of fluff are — especially around Christmas. When they’re not trying to climb the Christmas tree, they’re playing with all the sparkly baubles. And when they’re not clawing at Christmas presents, they’re pouncing up on kitchen worktops in search of all the festive food.

To help you lighten the mood this season and beyond we’ve searched high and low to compile a list of the best cat Christmas jokes you (and all the family) will find hiss-terical.

Funny cat jokes 

Funny cat Christmas jokes

(Image credit: Getty Images)

1. Why does a cat do stand-up at Christmas? He lives for the a-paws.
2. What’s a cat’s favorite film to watch on Christmas Day? The Sound of Meow-sic.
3. What do cats dream of? A white Chris-mouse.
4. How does a cat say Merry Christmas in Spanish? Flease Nividad.
5. What’s a cat’s favorite Christmas dessert? Mice cream.
6. What do cats say in December? It’s beginning to feline lot like Christmas.
7. Why do cats take so long to write Christmas cards? Because they want them to be purrr-fect.
8. What’s a cat’s favorite Christmas carol? ‘Tis the season Tabby Jolly.
9. What did the cat say on Christmas Day? Let’s paw-ty.
10. Why was the cat afraid of the Christmas tree? Because of its bark.
11. What's a cat's favorite Christmas pudding topping? Mice cream.
12. What happened to the cat who got stuck in the Christmas tree? It got claws-trophobia.
13. How did the cat know what to buy its friends? It looked in the cat-alogue.
14. What did the cat wear while Christmas caroling? A Christmas collar.
15. Why didn’t the cat like its Christmas present? It wasn’t up to scratch.
16. Why did the cat knock over the Christmas tree? Because it was too busy kitten around.
17. What do you call a cat celebrating Christmas on the beach? Sandy Claws.
18. What’s a kitten’s favorite Christmas song? I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Paws.
19. Where do cats meet to share a kiss? Under the meow-stletoe.
20. What’s Meowriah Carey’s most played song? All I Want Paw Christmas is You.
21. How do cats show each other affection at Christmas? They shower each other in purrr-sents.
22. What is a cat’s favorite Christmas song? Walking in a Whisker Wonderland.
23. Why do cats love Christmas carols? Because they love the sound of meow-sic.
24. What do cats write in their Christmas cards? Have yourself a meowy little Christmas.
25. Why did the cat get placed on the naughty list? Because it had a bad cat-titude.
26. What did the cat say when it knocked over the Christmas pudding? There goes another Christmas cat-astrophe.
27. What do cats say to each other on New Year’s Day? Have a paws-perous New Year.
28. What’s a cat’s favorite Christmas character? Fur-osty the Snowman.
29. What did the cat say after making a bad Christmas joke? Just kitten!
30. How do cats decorate for Christmas? They deck the paws with boughs of holly.
31. What did the cat say after he opened his Christmas presents? Thanks ‘fur’ everything.
32. When do cats get their presents? On the ‘furs’ day of Christmas.
33. Who brings presents to cats on Christmas? Santa paws.
34. What type of cereal do cats eat for breakfast on Christmas morning? Mice Krispies.
35. What do cats wear to bed on the night before Christmas? Paw-jamas.
36. Why do cats despise online shopping for Christmas presents? Because they prefer to browse through the cat-alogues.
37. Why don't cats play cards at Christmas? Because there are too many cheetahs.
38. What song do cats request at a Christmas party? Mice Mice Baby.
39. What ball did the cat get for Christmas? A hairball.
40. What was the cat’s favorite Christmas present? Its fur coat.

After even more pet gags? Discover the best funny cat jokes, check out our guide to the top-rated funny dog jokes and dive into the funny cat names that are bound to make you smile.