The Latest Breaking News from Bruce Wayne

This week sees the release of "The Batman," the latest big screen take on the Dark Knight, the top dog when it comes to our cinematic superheroes.

There’s this kid named Bruce Wayne. Rich. His parents were murdered. He lives with his butler in Gotham City. Likes gadgets, and cars, and absolutely abhors criminals. He’s got a thing for bats, too. Maybe you’ve heard of him?

Unrelentingly and unnecessarily bleak, "The Batman" is the darkest, heaviest big screen Batman yet, the result of years of fan demand that the Dark Knight's brooding match the weight of our world.

When the title character first sheds his cape and cowl in “The Batman,” a moody, methodical and, finally, disappointing return to Gotham City, your initial glimpse of Bruce Wayne might come as a mild shock. Not because of the fine actor playing him — it’s Robert Pattinson, as if you…