The prosecution: Lillian
Abigail secretly turns the radiators on in the day, while we’re out. But we’re trying to keep costs down
My daughter Abigail recently moved back home, with me and my husband, Rich. Although I love having her around, she’s a bit demanding with the central heating.
We’re trying to keep costs down but she’s constantly driving them up. We’ve set the heating to come on at 6pm every day, when Rich and I arrive home from work. But she moans about it and says, “Mum, it’s always freezing. This house is like a prison.” She’s a graphic designer and works remotely from our house, and always wants it boiling hot, even in winter.
We’ve had some arguments. A few times she’s had the heating on all day, only to turn it down again a couple of hours before we get home in the hope we won’t notice. But we weren’t born yesterday; we can tell when we walk in and feel the temperature.
Rich has sometimes come home early and found the radiators scalding hot. Abigail’s defence is she’s working from home and needs the heating on, so she doesn’t freeze. I’ve told her to wait until January, when it gets really cold, then she can start whacking the heating on in the late afternoon. I also think Abigail could go into her office or to a coffee shop to work if she doesn’t like the house rules, but she says I’m “evicting” her.
I now have a smart meter so I can see how much we’re spending on gas all day. If Abigail is at home with the heating on and using the oven to heat up her tiny lunches, I can track that. It sounds a bit anal, but I had to get it installed as she was being sneaky, and the rising cost of living means our gas and electricity bills have increased dramatically, like everyone else’s.
In Abigail’s previous place the rent included bills, so she isn’t used to worrying about the heating. She just turned everything up to the max when it was cold. That won’t wash in my house and I’ve told her to be more conscious. We’re charging her minimal rent – £300 a month – so she can save up to move out again next year, but in winter I’m considering increasing it to £375 just to cover additional gas costs. I don’t think that’s unreasonable.
The defence: Abigail
I work from home so need the heating on. I feel like a tenant being evicted during the cold
Mum and dad love to moan about my use of the heating, but I think it’s a bit of an overreaction. We have radiators installed for a reason, but they freak out when it’s time to use them.
Central heating is supposed to be turned on when we need it, but they have this militant schedule where everything is timed. If I deviate from it by turning the radiators on at the weekend, or when it’s just me in the house, they go mad. I work from home more than them, so surely it makes sense that I need to stay warm more.
My mum’s forbidden me from switching on the heating until the temperature drops to zero degrees in the mornings, but I’m cold now. Sometimes I have it on when I’m in the house alone, but I switch it off before my parents come back. But somehow they still notice. My dad puts his hand behind the radiator and says, “A-ha! I knew it,” and my mum starts shouting at me, saying I’m selfish. They have suggested I go and work in a coffee shop, but I don’t see why I should be pushed out of my own home. I feel like a tenant being evicted during the cold.
I was in a houseshare before I moved back home, but it ended as the landlord was selling up and I couldn’t find anywhere else affordable in my area. I know heating and bills have increased, but I guess I didn’t have to think about it much before, as the rent was all-inclusive.
I’m saving up to move out again, but with the price of rent in London, it will take me twice as long if they make me spend my salary on overpriced sandwiches in a coffee shop when I could just be working from home.
I know I’m lucky that my rent is only £300 a month, but it would be nice if that wasn’t being used against me every time I switch on the heating. I get on with my parents quite well, and I’m not in a hurry to move out again. I think it’s a bit silly to panic so much about pennies on the smart meter and ration the heating. We aren’t well off, but we all work and I pay my way. This obsession with tracking every unit of gas and electricity is just making home a bit less enjoyable for me.
The jury of Guardian readers
Should Abigail start contributing more towards the heating bills?
We had an incredibly mild autumn, but Abigail now needs to get some warmer clothes. I can picture her dancing around the house in her swimwear to Club Tropicana – where heating is free! Seriously though, Abigail needs to pay up or move out.
Roberto, 52
Abigail says she pays her way, but is not paying for the extra energy she uses. It’s awful to be cold so it’s understandable she wants the heating on, so why not just pay her parents for the additional energy, rather than go to a coffee shop?
Charlie, 41
Abigail only seems to care about her own pennies. If she wants to live at home, she needs to be more considerate of rising energy bills. She should put some extra layers on, rather than turn the heating up.
Robyn, 27
Abigail is not guilty. As someone with parents who don’t turn on the heating, I can sympathise with her. A cold house is very difficult to put up with. I think it would be better to just charge Abigail for the heating she uses. Don’t have a go at her for wanting to be warm now that it has turned cold.
Ella, 23
I don’t see the need for Abigail to heat the whole house for one person. Get a hot water bottle and some thermals if you want to save money, and buy a portable electric heater if you’re still cold. Lying to your parents when they’re letting you stay with them isn’t cool.
Anna, 25
Now you can be the judge
In our online poll below, tell us: should Abigail contribute more towards the heating bills?
The poll closes on Thursday 29 December at 10am
Last week’s result
We asked if Jerryl should throw out his CD and DVD collection.
19% of you said yes – Jerryl is guilty
81% of you said no – Jerryl is not guilty
