There are countless ways to ensure all your loved ones can come to your wedding - depending on budget you might invite them all to come for the whole day, or you might just have a select few people for the ceremony, and others to just the evening reception.
But one wedding guest was baffled when she was offered "the privilege" of serving food at the event so she could be part of that portion of the day, despite feeling she was quite close to the family. If that wasn't bad enough, she would then have to leave afterwards, when the actual evening guests would arrive.
The couple were having a "low budget" wedding, but still wanted a "fancy sit-down meal with servers" after their ceremony, which was only attended by "close friends and family".
The wedding guest told the story to her friend, who in turn shared it on popular parenting forum Mumsnet. Retelling the story, the anonymous woman said: "So they hired a town hall for an 'afternoon tea' luncheon type thing just after the wedding, with only close friends and family invited.
"They then asked other, less close, friends to 'have the privilege' of serving them at this 'high tea' event, free of charge, as a favour, instead of an invite to the wedding (not even the evening party that came later).
"It was actually phrased as 'would you like to have the privilege of serving us at our wedding?' and people who were asked were very much expected to see it as an honour. Apparently it's somewhat of the 'done thing' in their circle."
The woman continued: "One of the people asked to do it was a friend of mine. She actually thought she was quite close to the family, had known them years and been round for dinner and things like that, but realised they obviously didn't see her that way when instead of a proper invite to the wedding she was asked to do this.
The relatives and friends, who weren't even paid to help out, were also asked to wear uniforms, and were treated "exactly like" professional servers. The woman added: "Everyone at the table treated her exactly like a professional server, not making eye contact, not even thanking her, barking orders at her etc, even though she had known all of them for years and spent time at their house for gatherings.
"All the servers were 'thanked' a few weeks after the wedding with a box of basic Cadbury chocolates, the type that cost about £5 from Tesco. These boxes of chocolates were elaborately wrapped up and sent with thank you cards. Once opening the box, my friend realised they were all white...looked at the sell by date and they were years out!"
Do you have a wedding story to share? You can email ariane.sohrabishiraz@reachplc.co.uk
