“In sickness and in health” is a pretty standard wedding vow, to the point that many folks will actually add a lot to it because, let’s face it, looking after your sick partner shouldn’t just be reserved for marriage. However, some people just take this as a guideline, not a rule and are perfectly willing to leave their literal spouse hanging in times of need
A woman asked the internet if she was wrong to be angry when her husband left her alone after a near-death experience so he could “hang out with the boys.” We got in touch with the wife in the story and she shared some more details and her thoughts on the entire ordeal.
Most people don’t want to be alone after a near-death experience
Image credits: ShintarTatsiana/Pexels (not the actual photo)
But this is exactly what happened to one woman when her husband went off to hang out with his friends
Image credits: monkeybusiness/Envato (not the actual photo)
She shared some more details later
Image credits: Despite_Hope
The wife shared some thoughts about the story with us
Image credits: cottonbro studio/Pexels (not the actual photo)
Bored Panda got in touch with the woman who posted the story and she was kind enough to share some of her thoughts with us. First of all, we wanted to hear how she felt when her post went viral. “I think people found it so engaging because of the two fold mystery, what almost killed me and why didn’t my husband appear to care. Lifetime movie stuff, the husband did it. But I assure you he had no hand in it.”
“After the post blew up I had a hard heart to heart with him. And we are trying to work through it. He didn’t understand how bad it was or how messed up it was to leave me alone after. We have agreed that if either of us end up in the ER, regardless of the reason, boys night is canceled. He’s been very attentive ever since, even cooking dinner the last couple of nights. And invited me to the next game night,” she added.
“We still have no idea what caused the anaphylaxis. My regular family doctor was shocked it happened because I am not prone to allergies in the first place. The only thing we can think of is maybe I came into contact with Morphin or similar residue while at the store. Someone broke their pill and didn’t wash their hands and I somehow came into contact. But that’s just a theory.”
She left us with some parting thoughts. “For the most part the comments validated my feelings and gave me the strength to confront him, however I was very surprised by how many people worried he had a hand in it. Most of all, I found the outpouring of support and concern overwhelming, in a good way.”
Understanding emotional support needs is an important part of any relationship
Image credits: cottonbro studio/Pexels (not the actual photo)
While wedding vows are more a formality, it can be a bit surprising to see how many people think commitment is just a nice concept. After all, some variation of “in sickness and in health,” goes back over five hundred years, it’s not like we as humans have evolved past being sick or injured.
Expecting your partner to look after you or at least be concerned seems pretty normal. If you would do it for a friend, you should probably expect it from your spouse, at a minimum. The wife did give him “permission” to go hang out, although she was under the influence of so much medicine that she herself didn’t think it was a legitimate answer.
However, at the same time, she could have been so “under the influence” that him staying around would have seemed like a technicality. Looking after a sleeping person seems easy in theory, but you quickly realized that it’s mostly just sitting around. As she shared, he did actually take her complaints seriously. There are, unfortunately, too many stories of spouses or partners who flat-out refuse to own up.
This is, ultimately, the sort of question that every couple needs to discuss before it happens. After all, everyone has different opinions on what one “should do” in emergency situations. In this particular case, it’s not like he neglected her the whole time. However, physical and material support is just one side of the coin. Emotional support and security is just as important and should not be discounted.
Most people thought her reaction was warranted
