He has “potential.” Perhaps he is a genius who just needs a big break. Although he has a good heart, he carries a significant amount of trauma. You convince yourself that you can save him. You believe you can love him into being the man he is meant to be. However, three years later, you are exhausted, broke, and resentful, while he hasn’t changed at all.
If you have a pattern of dating “projects” instead of partners, you are likely stuck in the “Fixer-Upper” trap. This isn’t just bad luck; in reality, it is a subconscious choice. It stems from your own needs, not theirs. Breaking this pattern requires looking in the mirror, not just at your partner. Here is why you do it and how to stop.
