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Why 'pet parents' could be doing more harm than good, according to animal behaviouralists

Dog behaviourist Faith Wild says pets are not children and have different needs. (Supplied: Sammi Gowthorp)

Tamara Cavenett is a self-confessed "pet parent" and says she took her dog Benji everywhere with her for the first couple of years of his life.

"I was perfectly happy to go over to someone's house with my dog, regardless of what might have suited them," she said.

"So I certainly can understand people who treat them like their family."

But as a psychologist, Ms Cavenett says she soon realised there needed to be a healthy balance between spending time with her pet and her own wellbeing.

Tamara Cavenett with her 10-year-old Yorkshire Terrier 'Benji'. (Supplied)

"I think having some separation from your pet is healthy for them but also healthy for you," she said.

"Ask yourself, 'Do you think a reasonable average person would be doing what you're doing?'"

Animal behaviouralists warn if you treat your pet like your child, you may be doing more harm than good. 

Dog behaviourist Faith Wild says close bonds with our pets have been exacerbated due to the time we spent with them during COVID lockdowns. 

Ms Wild says the secret to happy dogs is for owners to make the rules and stick to them. (Supplied: Adam McGrath)

However, Ms Wild says pets are not children and have different needs. 

"If we don't understand the needs of our animals and give them boundaries it can create a lot of confusion," she said. 

"They don't understand what we want from them, or need from them, they can't learn to isolate by themselves." 

Owners need to 'make the rules'

Ms Wild says pet owners need to educate their dogs through understanding and trust, without ever being physical, and by speaking their language.

Max the terrier is often anxious so wears a thunder jacket and homemade ear muffs. (ABC Sunshine Coast: Ollie Wykeham)

"They will go to the person who commands respect," Ms Wild says.

"You don't have to browbeat them or be nasty, but you do have to draw a line where the rules are.

Ms Cavenett says having a dog is also beneficial for people experiencing loneliness after a break-up, a death, or when children have grown up and left home.

"There's a lot of really good research around about [pets] giving protective factors against mental health," she said.

"A lot of people do find that there is a lot of mood improvement in being around your pet, and there is some good research around how calming it can be just physically touching a pet." 

Be careful if your pet holds you back

Ms Cavenett warns that it can also be an issue for some people who use their pets as a reason to avoid living their lives because they are so attached to their animals.

Ms Cavenett said as a pet owner, you need to still be able to see people, feel comfortable leaving the house, and be able to maintain relationships with other people.

Puppies are amazing but Ms Cavenett says caring for them shouldn't impact our social interactions. (ABC Sunshine Coast: Sacha Hamilton-Maclaren)

There can be a tendency to project our own emotions and feelings onto our pets, she adds.

"I know that some people will look at their dog in the morning and go, 'Oh, look at her self-esteem, it's just so low!'" Ms Cavenett said.

"While it is useful to have a pet, they cannot fulfil all of your social needs and stay home because of that — is a bit of a concern.

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