How often, would you say, do chairs break? I’m going to open the bidding with “not very often”. Not never. God, no. I’m not saying that! I won’t be cornered into such an absurd pronouncement. That would be “Liz Truss will never be prime minister” all over again! But my general expectation, when in a room, is that most of the chairs are going to remain functional until I leave it. The same thing used to be said of prime ministers.
More often than seeing a chair break, you come across one that’s basically already broken, betraying saucy glimpses of dowel, for the imps of fate to guide the ample posterior of a sensitive soul towards on some relatively public occasion, preferably while the soul is holding a large slice of gateau.
