It's taken me a while to write this because I always feel it is best not to write when upset.
So, here we are, months after the events that made me lose my mind; and I no longer feel like shouting. I feel like speaking my mind.
Yes, this is about what happens to women who express opinions - but also about what happens when a senior politician decides to encourage a pile-on.
Mark Parton is the leader of the ACT opposition, in as much as it genuinely exists. It would be a tough gig at the best of times in very Labor territory. But his behaviour recently has made me wonder whether he is up to the job.
He was accused of sending a text to a sex worker during a budget estimates hearing. That included one saying "f--- my job is boring. Wanna swap". How did we hear about this? An anonymous complaint about Parton's alleged behaviour was sent to Speaker Jeremy Hanson.
He denies everything, at least as far as the sex worker is concerned. He doesn't deny saying his job is boring.
ACT Attorney-General Tara Cheyne didn't care one bit if the allegation was true. "Sex work is work. It's a legitimate profession, and if that's who it was, so be it," she said.
I do not care much about the job of the text recipient either, except in this circumstance where the texter has the law-and-order, family vibe. If it's true he was sending texts to a sex worker while at the same time sharing images of his wife on social media and thanking her, then that's more than ick.
The fact Parton so vehemently denied that there was a sex worker involved suggests he - and presumably his wife - doesn't agree it's a "so be it" matter.
Also, I do care that a bloke earning $300,000 a year and who is meant to be representing territorians is bored. Harden up. Boring is dealing with politicians who take their constituents for granted. You don't get the right to be bored when you are meant to be ears-and-eyes alert. Get your hand off your phone, mate.
And what are we to make of the fact Parton's story kept on changing, all while he refused to reveal anything about the identity of the recipient? Did he think we would all just forget about it?
Is this a man of good character, you have to ask yourself?
I think his previous job, as a shock jock, has ill-prepared him for a life of service. Maybe Elizabeth Lee was boring but at least you knew what you were getting (although I was a bit shocked at the footage of her dispensing a middle finger. Where are we, the primary school playground?)
Now here's my own most recent experience with Parton.
In April, I wrote a column which endorsed the concept of a minister for men. One had just been installed in Victoria by the then-premier Jacinta Allan. And then Mark Parton said he would act in such a role in the ACT, should he ever be in government.
Without wishing to be a tosser, I'll quote myself: "Parton's right about one thing though. He says every state and territory should have a minister for men and boys. That's exactly what Victorian Premier Jacinta Allan did last week when she appointed former teacher Paul Edbrooke to that role."
But somehow he didn't read the column all the way through (I know, 900 words). Instead he posted on Facebook inviting his followers to attack me. It was mental. I didn't know this at the time because I try to avoid the Facebook pages of politicians unless I'm writing about them. Somehow their smiling, staged pictures make me grumpy. But comments on my column were wild and many of them either deleted or deactivated because of their abuse. The emails. My goodness.
At about 1pm that day, I got an email from Parton. He said he'd felt attacked, shared the article on Facebook "with a veiled call to action" to his followers (this is straight from his email, I'm not paraphrasing that's why it is in quotes). He also confessed that he'd read the piece at 5.45am but then re-read it a number of times when he was "fully awake". "We actually agree on much more than we disagree on."
Then he'd edited the Facebook page.
There was not one word of an apology. Not one. An invitation to talk but that was about it. Truly, my first response was to tell him to eff off, speaking of primary school playgrounds.
Earlier this year, UN Women released a report which made clear the impact of online violence and abuse directed at women.
"Women journalists and media workers are experiencing an escalating online violence crisis compared to their situation in 2020," the report said.
It showed a significant increase in the rate of women journalists and media workers reporting cases of online violence to the police, with the respondents in 2025 more than twice as likely (22.4 per cent) to make a police complaint than they were in 2020 (11 per cent).
Fortunately there was nothing this time that would have encouraged me to make a report to the police - but the rudeness and vile language was out of control. Why should I have to put up with that because a man in a position of authority decided to sic his followers onto me even though he hadn't even read my article properly?
A spokesman for Mr Parton said the claims about the text message were false, malicious and a clear attempt to smear him.
Well, I definitely know that feeling. Mark Parton gave me a lesson in how that works.
