It was prom night this week on the WorldTour. You remember your school prom, don’t you? The one where you got all dolled up with your mates, split a few pre-game Budweisers, and headed down to a local events hall - usually inside a two-star hotel - for a night of boozing, supervised by your teachers.
For pro cyclists, it’s basically the same format, except they hold it inside a wind tunnel, apparently.
You’ve probably already seen the photo: Specialized’s class of 2024. It was shared mercilessly across the socials this week. And we absolutely love it.
It’s classy, quite clearly photoshopped, and made us nostalgic for that post-exams night of teenage revelry. Let me run you through the classmates.
First there’s Jai Hindley. He’s the one who brought the Budweisers. He also brought a small tub of hair gel, and has spent 30 minutes coiffuring himself in the bathroom.
Wedged between cool kids Lotte Kopecky and Demi Vollering is Primož Roglič. He told his mum he didn’t want to go. He doesn’t like the music, he said, and besides, he’s only just moved to this school, he barely knows anyone.
His pleas were met with a blunt response. “Go make some friends, Primož.” So he went down to Moss Bros, rented a suit, and here he is, hands in his pockets, wishing he was at home on his Xbox.
Julian Alaphilippe, by the way, is the only one who actually owns his suit. He got it for his 18th birthday, as well as a very smart watch you just have to see.
In front of the Frenchman is Remco Evenepoel. He’s playing in the band. He’s a skilled percussionist, sat poised on his cajón, ready to drum out the rhythm to some Arctic Monkeys covers. Roglič doesn’t know any of the words.
Finally there’s Kasper Asgeen. Lorena Wiebes, the saint that she is, has been put in charge of looking after him. At the drinks reception, the headmaster said it was strictly one glass of prosecco each, but Asgreen helped himself to more. He then called one of the teachers by their first name.
Anyway… Elsewhere on social media this week, Geraint Thomas has been to the cinema, Katy Marchant stars in School of Rock, and the content keeps flowing out of Australia.
1. Here they are: the class of 2024
We Are Specialized..Meet the class of 2024 with Lotte Kopecky, Demi Vollering and Lorena Wiebes#iamspecialized #wesparksuccess pic.twitter.com/8bPsrIGEVzJanuary 16, 2024
2. You didn't really think they photographed all the riders together, did you?
3. The afterparty never ends for showman Julian Alaphilippe
One of cycling’s best entertainers 😁#TourDownUnder pic.twitter.com/YOep9ntEsAJanuary 19, 2024
4. EF's remake is less school prom and more Teletubbies
We heard wind themed photo shoots are all the rage right now pic.twitter.com/NQDW8WijUcJanuary 17, 2024
5. Australians, please excuse our terrible Northern Hemisphere humour, but this gag never gets old
6. Crikey, mate!
Now that's something you won't see in the Tour de France🇦🇺🦘 #TourDownUnder@SantosLtd #TourDownUnder📺 Stream the race now on 7plus: https://t.co/k2Exq3FDwl pic.twitter.com/e5KbZaORPjJanuary 18, 2024
7. Sam Welsford has picked up three wins so far at the Tour Down Under, and two extra arms
8. Don't mess with Mat Hayman
Hayman’s a little strict this TDU 😳🤠No pressure guys! 🙊🙈#TourDownUnder 🇦🇺 pic.twitter.com/GOR9eeGYfoJanuary 15, 2024
9. There are 22 fist bumps in this video. Who remembers when we used to bump elbows during Covid?
10. It looks like dsm-firmenich PostNL have been working on their lead-out train for Charlotte Kool
A new race numbers pinning technique 😂 Our Women’s program honing that lead-out ahead of their crit action!#TourDownUnder pic.twitter.com/NErQzghu6MJanuary 18, 2024
11. Introducing Arnaud de whee-Lie
Have a wheelie good day! pic.twitter.com/LYoWXdZK0bJanuary 15, 2024
12. Here's 6ft4 Alex Kirsch doing a Lidl bit of drafting
Kirsch drafting behind Realini.💀 I'm dead. pic.twitter.com/RnJ2PTDpKPJanuary 15, 2024
13. What did you make of the bath scene, Geraint?
Who else has watched ‘Saltburn’? Thoughts?January 14, 2024
14. Cam Mason has great cyclo-cross skills, but even better taste in fizzy drinks
One of the best days of my life 🥰 Doing the double, in front of all the people I love. Thank you everyone 🫶🏴🇬🇧 pic.twitter.com/XeCOfj9IEUJanuary 13, 2024
15. If Jack Black commentated on track cycling...
16. I like to think that if I ever won a European title, I'd celebrate with finger guns too
We're happy to call her a legend! 😉🤩@EmmaFinucane123 | #EuroTrack24 https://t.co/me8pjROmrw pic.twitter.com/uQHppfq9q6January 12, 2024