A TikToker who previously dated men exclusively says her life has been transformed by her first relationship with a woman. The creator, who posts as @brianaksmith, explains that entering this relationship at 32 has completely shifted her perspective on how to communicate with a partner.
The creator notes that she simply cannot hide small changes in her mood or energy around her girlfriend. If she has a shift in energy, her partner immediately picks up on it and asks what is wrong. Even a small facial expression or a sarcastic comment is enough to kick off a conversation. She says this experience has taught her that she can no longer stay silent when something is bothering her.
She also has high praise for the way her girlfriend handles concerns. When problems pop up, they talk them through and work toward actual solutions. She mentioned that she receives genuine apologies, reassurance, and, most importantly, actual behavioral changes. That experience has made her realize that communicating her needs can actually lead to meaningful change.
The creator also wants that same level of feedback regarding her own behavior
She explains that she cares when something she does upsets her partner, and that mutual attention keeps them both aware of each other’s feelings at all times. She calls that dynamic one of the best parts of the relationship. It is that constant check-in that seems to create such a strong foundation.
@brianaksmith What’s the biggest difference you’ve seen? #lateinlifelesbian #wlw #comingout #comingoutsupport #lateinlifelesbiansupport
♬ original sound – Bri
Her video has really taken off on TikTok, drawing more than 69,000 likes and over 1,116 comments as of publication. The reaction has been a total mix of support, debate, and personal stories. Some people really resonated with the idea of emotional attentiveness being a game changer. One commenter wrote, “Welcome to being with a woman, we pay attention. Lol.” Another viewer added, “There is just more emotional intelligence with a woman to woman relationship.”
However, not everyone agrees that this is strictly a gendered experience. Some users pushed back, suggesting that what the creator is describing is simply a healthy relationship with an emotionally aware person. One commenter noted, “That’s called a healthy relationship and an emotionally aware person,” while also adding, “It’s not like that with everyone though.” Another user pointed out that this is not unique to women, writing, “Gay men say the same thing.”
The conversation in the comments also touched on how productive and fun constant communication can be. One user wrote, “It’s amazing how one conversation can be productive, caring, sexy, romantic and flirty.” They added that talking with their partner felt “so fun.” Another commenter was quite bold in their support, writing, “A man will never be able to love a woman the way another woman can. UNMATCHED!!”
