Thursday news quiz: catchphrases, crowds, coups and catastrophes

The scorpion of knowledge has some questions for you. Illustration: Anaïs Mims/The Guardian

It is time for the Thursday news quiz. The scorpion of knowledge, delightfully illustrated by Anaïs Mims, has 15 questions for you. They are designed to lull you into a false sense of security before delivering a very small but memorable sting. Or an in-joke punchline you’ve seen 1,057 times already. One or the other. There are no prizes, but we enjoy hearing how you got on in the comments. Allons-y!

The Thursday news quiz, No 235

1. 

   Who (pictured) has been sworn in as the new prime minister of Bangladesh?

   1. Shafiqur Rahman

   2. Nahid Islam

   3. Tarique Rahman

   4. Fazlul Huq

2. 

   An Amazon delivery van driver (not pictured) got stuck on mudflats trying to drive along one of Britain’s most dangerous coastal paths while following GPS directions to try to get to an island in the Thames estuary. What is the coastal path called?

   1. The Tideway

   2. The Broomway

   3. The Shoreway

   4. The Haddaway

3. 

   A supermarket (not pictured) has gone viral after the sounds made by its malfunctioning fridges have been claimed on social media to sound like Brian Eno's ambient works. Where?

   1. Gosport

   2. Newcastle

   3. Peterborough

   4. Sheffield

4. 

   This week's blurry feline interloper is this random cat that keeps following the quiz master home, presumably in a bid to become the official random cat of the Guardian Thursday news quiz. They probably want to know the name of the former chief mouser of the UK Foreign Office, whose death was announced this week. What was it?

   1. Disraeli

   2. Palmerston

   3. Nelson

   4. Larry

5. 

   An actor at a theatre (not pictured) was at the weekend shouted down, pelted with fruit and subjected to an attempted stage invasion as he delivered a final monologue in character as a far-right activist. Where?

   1. Bochum, Germany

   2. Lisbon, Portugal

   3. Gdansk, Poland

   4. Klow, Syldavia

6. 

   Heathrow's boss, Thomas Woldbye, says the airport's terminals aren't crowded, but are perceived to be because …

   1. Passengers arrive earlier than in other countries because they overestimate security delays

   2. British travellers form orderly queues that take up more floor space than continental crowds

   3. British people keep to the left and normally Europeans keep to the right

   4. The terminals are haunted by the ghosts of delayed passengers from 1998

7. 

   You all knew that the dog (pictured) getting on to the cross-country Winter Olympic course was going to be in the quiz. What is his Lord of the Rings-inspired name?

   1. Samwise

   2. Aragorn

   3. Radagast

   4. Nazgul

8. 

   Today would have been the birthday of Dick Emery, whose self-titled television series ran from 1963 to 1981. He was born in 1915. Happy heavenly birthday, Dick! Which of these was one of his catchphrases?

   1. Ooh, you are awful... but I like you!

   2. Ooh, I could crush a grape!

   3. Shut that door!

   4. This Town Ain’t Big Enough for Both of Us

9. 

   Farther or nearer with Geordie Alan Shearer! This week we imagine the England soccer legend wants to know, if he leaves his hometown of Newcastle-upon-Tyne, which is farther or nearer – Rome, Italy or Lisbon, Portugal?

   1. Lisbon, Portugal is nearer to Newcastle-upon-Tyne than Rome, Italy

   2. Rome, Italy is nearer to Newcastle-upon-Tyne than Lisbon, Portugal

10. 

    Here is Karl-Heinz, with his opening lines, which almost rhymes. This week, the Thursday quiz imagines the German soccer ace would like to know which Shakespeare play opens 'If music be the food of love, play on'?

    1. Romeo and Juliet

    2. Twelfth Night

    3. Love's Labour's Lost

    4. Carry On Up the Khyber

11. 

    Which former British prime minister (not pictured) posted a selfie with Donald Trump to their social media?

    1. John Major

    2. Liz Truss

    3. David Cameron

    4. Harriet Jones

12. 

    Least or most with Liberace's ghost. This week, the Thursday quiz imagines the ghost of Liberace would like to know which actor has won the most Razzies?

    1. Arnold Schwarzenegger

    2. Jared Leto

    3. Jean-Claude Van Damme

    4. Sylvester Stallone

13. 

    In 1990, Depeche Mode urged you to enjoy what?

    1. The solitude

    2. The silence

    3. The sound

    4. The spanking

14. 

    On this day with Brian May! And his badger! Today, 19 February, is the anniversary of Pedro Lascuráin serving for just 45 minutes as president – a record even Thursday quiz favourite Liz Truss could envy. The Thursday quiz imagines Queen's legendary guitarist wants you to tell him – and his badger – in which country?

    1. Mexico

    2. Bolivia

    3. Ecuador

    4. Borduria

15. 

    And finally, China has started celebrating New Year (pictured in Beijing). It is now the year of the …

    1. Snake

    2. Rabbit

    3. Ox

    4. Horse

    5. Goat

    6. Beaver

    7. Escaped macaque

    8. Feral hog

    9. Very naughty miniature dachshund

Solutions

1:C - The swearing-in of Tarique Rahman restored an elected government after 18 months of caretaker rule led by the Nobel peace prize laureate Muhammad Yunus, 2:B - The Broomway is a 600-year-old path across the flats to Foulness Island which has been called the deadliest in the country, and frankly the island's name should probably alert you to the cursedness, 3:D - 'It’s like all the fans have been carefully tuned to the calmest droning chord ever, it’s like being in an electrical gong bath,' said one possibly over-stimulated Reddit user, 4:B - The cat, adopted from Battersea Dogs & Cats Home, retired in 2020 after four years of service in Whitehall, and died in Bermuda, which has raised a lot of questions in the mind of the Thursday quiz, 5:A - The violent scenes were on Saturday during the German premiere of the Portuguese playwright Tiago Rodrigues’s work Catarina, or the Beauty of Killing Fascists, 6:C - Bless him. He literally said that out loud of those waiting to get a lovely skyboi: 'The problem is that all the British people keep to the left and normally Europeans keep to the right. And they do that in both directions. So we can be crashing into each other, and I see that from personal experience. We just need to make sure that everybody going this way keeps to the left and this way to the right. I know that’s simplified, but that is the sort of thinking that we need'. Presumably this is why they pay him the big bucks, 7:D - Nazgul’s owners told NPR the two-year-old was probably looking for company rather than athletic glory, and Thursday quiz colleague Tom Lutz wrote that 'despite a lung-bursting surge in the homestretch' of the women’s team cross-country sprint, he couldn't have won a medal because he hadn't completed the entire course. And also he is a dog, 8:A - And that is how the Thursday quiz feels about you. Yes, you. Personally, 9:B - Rome, Italy is only about 1,780km away from Newcastle-upon-Tyne, whereas Lisbon, Portugal is about 1,900km away, a difference of about 252,000 ancient Sumerian cubits. Top bins!, 10:B - It is said by Orsino, 11:B - Of course it was. She has as many as just over 21,000 subscribers to her YouTube show now, you know, 12:D - It is Stallone, with 12. Although he has also been presented with a Razzie Redeemer award, given to someone who has comeback from winning a Razzie to achieve critical acclaim, 13:B - In 1990 it became one of their biggest ever hit singles in the UK. It was their 1984 single Master and Servant that was about spanking, 14:A - Regarded as the shortest time anybody was ever president of a country, his role was essentially to pass on the baton from an administration that had just been deposed in a coup to the coup leader, Victoriano Huerta, 15:D - The horse apparently symbolises being 'animated, active, energetic', which the Thursday quiz definitely does not feel about 2026

Scores

1. 0 and above.

   We hope you had fun – let us know how you got on in the comments

If you really do think there has been an egregious error in one of the questions or answers – and can show your working and are absolutely 100% positive you aren’t attempting to factcheck a joke – you can complain about it in the comments below. Why not watch Ace (or ‘I Wanna Be Like Sophie Aldred’) by The Kids in Spacesuits instead?