Oliver Sim has opened up about secretly living with HIV for more than half of his life
(Picture: Getty Images)Oliver Sim has opened up about secretly living with HIV for nearly half of his life having first being diagnosed at the age of 17.
The xx bassist, 32, decided the time was right to speak about his condition after writing a song about his experience.
Entitiled Hideous, the musician said that the track was part of his working through feelings of fear and shame.
Taking to Instagram, he wrote: “I’ve been living with HIV since I was 17 and it’s played with how I’ve felt towards myself, and how I’ve assumed others have felt towards me, from that age and into my adult life.
“So, quite impulsively, I wrote it on a song called Hideous. I thought I could release it in the world and be done with it.
“After playing the song to my mum, being the protective and wise mum that she is, she gave me some of the best advice I’ve ever received.
“She suggested that I spend some time having conversations with people in my life first.
“Either people I hadn’t told yet, or people I had told but hadn’t wanted to talk much further on it.”
Sim went on to tell how he spent the next two years having those “difficult and uncomfortable conversations” which has allowed him to “feel a lot freer” and strengthened his relationship with the people in his life and with himself.
He shared how he had reached out to Scottish singer Jimmy Somerville, whose 80s synthpop band Bronski Beat’s debut album, The Age Of Consent, was seen as a landmark release for the gay community.
He added: “I knew for Hideous I wanted a guardian angel to appear in the song and sing to me the words I needed to hear.
“Not only has Jimmy been such a powerful voice around HIV and Aids for decades, but the man quite literally sounds like a guardian angel.
“I reached out to him as a complete fan boy, but now consider him a real good friend.
“He encouraged me to do the song for myself. And most importantly, he reminded me not to take myself too seriously, no good comes from that!
“Am I Hideous?’ feels far less like a question I’m asking the world now. I know the answer.
“As scary as it feels, I’m excited to share this music with you, and I hope you enjoy it.”
Hideous features on Sim’s upcoming solo album Hideous Bastard, which will be released on September 9.
The British star has shot an accompanying video for Hideous which was directed by Yann Gonzalez. It’s part of a longer visual counterpart that debuted at Cannes over the weekend.
