True crime aficionados can now watch Netflix’s documentary Sweet Bobby, which explores one of the most perplexing catfishing stories in recent memory.
The story first gained traction two years ago through the gripping Sweet Bobby podcast, which detailed a woman who spent nearly a decade in a relationship without ever meeting or video calling the man she believed was her boyfriend.
Kirat Assi, 43, from west London, fell into an elaborate deception involving a man named Bobby Jandu, whom she thought was a doctor.
What began as a platonic friendship gradually morphed into a deep relationship, with the two communicating daily over the phone often, and having conversations that frequently became sexual.
Assi was told about a series of distressing events, including that Jandu had been shot, had entered the witness protection programme and even was suffering from a brain tumour.
However, the truth was far more difficult for her to stomach: Assi's cousin, Simran Bhogal, was the mastermind behind the entire ruse.
Assi had routinely shared her relationship woes with Bhogal, who crafted the false persona and maintained a network of up to 50 fake profiles to support the hoax.
In the Netflix trailer, Assi said about the deceit: “What happened to me is just one crazy story. You can't make it up. We're talking about ten years of my life.” She believed she was in love with Jandu, convinced he was living in Australia, when all the while he was a fictional character built upon the real identity of an unsuspecting man.
The deception only unravelled when Assi, frustrated by unanswered questions, hired a private detective and discovered the chilling truth. This saga is considered one of the longest and most complex cases of catfishing ever reported.
The beginning
It started in 2009 when Assi, a prominent figure in London’s Sikh community, was working as an arts and events assistant and presenting a show on Radio Desi. She received an unexpected Facebook message from a man she thought was Bhogal's ex-boyfriend, JJ.
She spoke to JJ for five months and the pair developed a friendship. JJ then died and Bhogal encouraged her to reach out to Bobby. The fake profile used the real Jandu's photos and some biographical details, and in November 2010 Assi had her first encounter with the fake Facebook profile.
Initially, Bobby claimed to be married, but soon turned the narrative into one of a failing relationship. Assi supported him throughout his divorce but things took a dark turn when Assi received a message that Bobby had been shot and then in January 2014, she learned that he had died.
"I was invited to join a Facebook group of his friends. There were 39 people in it. I have since learned that none of them was real," she said. However, soon after she received an email informing her that Bobby was actually alive and had faked his own death, and was in a witness protection programme.
"Ridiculous," she admitted. "But at every step, these mad happenings were being backed up by other people." In 2015, she was told he had a brain tumour, followed by a stroke. On Valentine’s Day he declared his love for her. "I was not expecting him to live.
“His consultant [there were also constant messages from his fake medical team] did not expect him to live beyond July," she had said three years ago. "I am not a mushy sort of person. When he said 'I love you', I didn't know what to make of it, but I did love him... as a friend, then.
"I also thought 'Where's the harm?' It's not as if I was ever going to be in a physical relationship with this person. But he kept putting the idea in my head. And everyone else kept saying: 'Oh, he's so in love with you'." The two became a "couple".
But by 2017 the fake Bobby became unbearable, even demanding Assi pay for a private mammogram when she experienced chest pains. Eventually, Assi was signed off work due to stress. Despite numerous failed attempts to meet in person, Bobby always had an excuse, often threatening suicide if Assi pushed for a face-to-face meeting.
The deception continued until Assi discovered that Bhogal was behind it all after hiring a private investigator. She also confronted the real Bobby, who was unaware that his identity had been used in a nine-year campaign of abuse and deceit. Assi's Kirat’s heartbreak turned into a quest for justice, but police informed her that no criminal offence had occurred.
While she settled a civil case against Bhogal, the emotional scars lingered. “She has taken ten years of my life from me,” she lamented. “In that time, I could have met someone real, had a baby. I lost my friends, my job, my savings.” The podcast captured Assi's harrowing journey, including the shocking moment she learned the truth.
“I kept screaming, ‘Why, why did you do this? You had every chance to stop,’” Kirat recalled. “Bobby, who will also feature in the Netflix documentary, revealed that Bhogal had been deceiving both him and Kirat simultaneously. Their lives even intersected at a night out, with Assi unaware of the chaos brewing behind the scenes.
In a recent interview, Assi called for catfishing to be treated more seriously within the legal system, stating, “I think it might serve as a deterrent for a lot of people to know that if you're caught, then immediately it's a crime … All this time, who have I been sleeping on the phone with?”
Sweet Bobby is available on Netflix