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The Guardian - UK
The Guardian - UK
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Max Fletcher

The hill I will die on: enough of the ‘Hey you!’ faux friend nonsense. You’re a business, not my mate

A balloon with a smiley face

How do you feel when big corporations address you directly? (In other words, when they use the second-person pronoun “you” in their communications.) Do you feel like you’re valued? That you’re being treated as an individual? Or does it make you want to grab their CEO by the scruff of the neck and tell them to shut up?

It’s impossible nowadays to buy food, walk down the street or even open your emails without businesses trying to chat you up. A carton of Alpro oat milk shouts “Hey you!” from the dairy aisle. A restaurant you visited once sends a circular with “We miss you!” in the subject line. You get a bill from Octopus Energy with 41 uses of this cursed pronoun, but it never once addresses you with “Dear”.

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