Well, that was Bake Off 2023.
And before I say goodbye, I just want to say thank you to Kate Abbott and Alexi Duggins for their help in getting the liveblog ready every single week. Thank you also to the Guardian’s excellent technical team.
But I also want to thank you, the reader. I’ve been writing this liveblog every week for the past 10 weeks and it has been such a privilege. Your comments and your emails have been such a delight. It really has been the highlight of my week.
You can find me at @scottygb pretty much everywhere. I’m off to see what Twitter / X has to say about Matty. Godspeed.
“Abbi is still foraging for ingredients in her local forest.”
OF COURSE SHE IS. Bless Abbi.
I guess it also proves that you don’t need to be the most consistent baker in the tent to win the whole of Bake Off either. You can win essentially by not being the worst in Bake Off each week and then sharpening your skills enough by the time you make it to the final.
Will his win annoy some people? Perhaps, but it’s only a television show. And Matty doesn’t deserve any stick.
I really thought that Matty was about to propose to Lara, before realising that they are already engaged to be married lol
It was completely unthinkable 10 weeks ago that Matty would be the winner of Bake Off, but he just kept getting better and better.
He’s an example to us all that if you aren’t great at something, you can end up flying just as far by buckling down and putting in the work. Talent gets you far, but perseverance gets you further.
“I don’t know what to say, everyone said you should go on Bake Off and I thought it was a throwaway comment and never really listened to it,” says Matt. “I never thought I would be on the show let alone win it!”
BLOODY ELL
The winner of the Great British Bake Off is … Matty!
HE’S ONLY GONE AND DONE IT. The underdog won.
“Can I be the person who actually announces the winner? That’s all I want.”
I really hope Alison comes back next year. She has to. A lovely addition.
Dan doesn’t seem to care at all that he isn’t going to win. He’s just happy to be there.
Rather remarkable to hear that Josh’s wasn’t as good when he literally built Glastonbury Tor with a shed on the top.
Calm down Scott. They’ve not announced the winner yet.
Going into an adbreak feeling that Matty has won or lost at the same time.
Holy hell HOLY HELL I think Matty is going to win Bake Off.
Good GOD. Try to act cool Scott. Be cool. BE COOL SCOTT BE COOL.
SCOTT BE COOL.
ADEQUATE!!!
BORING!
That’s very harsh.
You cannot taste the apple in Josh’s bake. “It needed something more.”
GOSH!
The lemon curd has got some flavour, but his cake may be overbaked.
The flavours are “adequate.”
REPEAT: the flavours are ADEQUATE.
Josh's 'A Slice For All Seasons' Cake Showstopper for the Bake Off Final. #GBBO pic.twitter.com/cbZuqdb1r6
— British Bake Off (@BritishBakeOff) November 28, 2023
Dan asking Josh whether he needs help bringing it up to the table is peak Josh behaviour.
The whole thing looks stunning, although Paul says “the pipe work is not very neat.”
Gosh.
EXTER-MI-CAKE!
With some minor alterations, Matty could have turned his Showstopper into something else entirely! #GBBO #DoctorWho pic.twitter.com/PHbES7R8l4
— British Bake Off (@BritishBakeOff) November 28, 2023
Up next … it’s Matty.
It’s leaning a bit, but it is for “dramatic effect,” quips Matty.
“What a great cake,” says Prue.
“Absolutely delicious” says Paul.
All the flavours have been deemed with this cake.
The only thing that is wrong with it is that it looks a bit drunk.
Matty's 'Final Celebration' Cake Showstopper for the Bake Off Final. #GBBO pic.twitter.com/1OjtGI6fXV
— British Bake Off (@BritishBakeOff) November 28, 2023
Dan’s macarons were macawrong and the shield around the sponge has cracked. It also needs more lemon.
Bless him, I don’t think we have a winner here. This is Matty v Josh.
But Dan should be very proud he made it this far.
Dan's 'Lemon Drizzle Memory Lane' Cake Showstopper for the Bake Off Final. #GBBO pic.twitter.com/5kw7Nu6Hbb
— British Bake Off (@BritishBakeOff) November 28, 2023
And now it’s the final showstopper judging.
It’s Josh, isn’t it? It has to be Josh.
The time between Marie appearing on screen and saying the word wee: 0.34 seconds.
Saku’s big verdict for the Bake Off final: “Either Dan or Josh or Matty.” Thanks Saku.
And Keith: “It’s like having to choose your favourite child. It is a very difficult decision … Josh.”
Josh’s bake looks absolutely stunning.
I think Josh might have nailed this. It all comes down to how it tastes.
What was everyone’s first bake?
Josh’s bake looks absolutely stunning.
I think Josh might have nailed this. It all comes down to how it tastes.
“Gold leaf the fuck out of it.” – Matty in The Great British Bake Off Final 2023.
You know when your macarons are going wrong when you are literally scraping from the bottle of the oven tray.
Oh and Dan’s chocolate shield doesn’t cover the entire cake either. Nightmare.
Of course Matty has invented his own cake decoration technique, essentially smearing on the design at the side, because he doesn’t know how to do it any other way. He picked it up from his partner, Lara’s art class. And it looks lovely.
A reminder. This is the final of The Great British Bake Off. How does he do it?
Oh GOD. One of Matt’s genoise buns is underdone so he’s shoved them back in the oven.
Dan also seems like he is not going to get his bakes done in time.
Remember the tease at the start of the episode, where Prue says one of the bakers does not do their best at this challenge. Who will it be?
There’s two things you can count on in this life …
After the darkness comes the dawn.
And Dan will drop an oven rack as he takes something out of the oven.
Matty is stacking sponges for the very first time in this challenge. God help us.
And he’s also making buttercream – the guy who curdled his buttercream three times in cake week.
We’ve come full circle.
Matty is either trying to prove to the judges (and himself) that he has improved a lot since then. Or he has a death wish. Or both.
Josh is baking a triple stacked rhubarb and strawberry sponge, with a biscuit shed on the top and see-through windows.
It is a celebration of (what is left of) his garden.
Dan is making a triple lemon drizzle cake and meringue combo (no Thai green curry? Boo)
For their showstopper, they have to make a three-tiered celebration cake.
It has to incorporate the first thing they ever baked for some reason.
Oh and they have to elevate it to another level. Helpful, as it is a tiered cake!
The judges, Noel and Alison are discussing who has a hope of winning Bake Off.
Noel: “How about Amos?”
☠️☠️☠️
Also, that will be the last time I ever see a lardy cake on television and for that I am thankful.
Their rankings:
3. Matty 2. Dan. 1. Josh.
We’re no closer to working out who the winner will be after all that. Matty is third, but his signature barely had a criticism. Dan came second here but his eclairs were too messy earlier. Josh is ahead, but it is all down to the showstopper.
It’s the lardy cake technical challenge judging
Here are Paul and Prue’s reviews: they have all struggled with the proving. Josh’s lardy cake has good lamination and good flavouring. Dan’s bakes are caramelised and overbaked, have uneven layers, and are too dry.
Matty’s have not really been baked at all.
Dan has upgraded his lardy cake to 200 degrees to “nuke them.”
And the final trio look like they have all successfully baked … a paving slab?
Matty this entire challenge: “10 mins. I mean, 20 mins. 10 mins? 30 mins. 10 seconds? 5 seconds. Done.”
They are all putting their lard in the proving drawer.
As you can tell by that sentence, this isn’t the most exciting of challenges.
Bake Off bosses: You know what this finale needs?
Production team: …..
Bake Off bosses: Lardy cake.
Paul Hollywood seems to have a thing for lardy cakes.
The very first Hollywood Handshake was given to Ryan Chong from Bake Off series three, who happened to make … a lardy cake!
“He’s a bread man and lardy cakes are a bread product. I got the impression mine reminded him of his youth and touched him on some level.:”
You can read about his story (and other TV firsts) in this great article.
Of course Prue likes lardy cake.
And Paul is enthusiastically talking about how much pig fat it involves.
The technical challenge are nine lardy cakes.
That’s exactly what the finale of a series needs. LARD.
Fair to say that the standings are 1. Josh. 2. Matty (but only just behind, really). 3. Dan.
And finally, Dan.
His salted caramel and hazelnut praline is too soggy and Paul is not convinced on the flavour.
Next up, Matty’s black forest and banoffee eclairs.
It has a good level of booze (Prue approves of course) and they are also firm and crisp, which is good!
The judging starts with Josh, with his coconut mango and raspberry eclairs.
“Pretty uniform across the board” says Paul.
“I am always soft when I have an empty eclair,” adds Prue.
How often do you come across this problem, Prue?
And now it is the final signature judging.
And Prue and Paul … who on Earth eats an eclair with a spoon?
Dan’s choux is not soft. Repeat. Dan’s chouxs is not soft!
I’m going to miss writing sentences like these. Not going to lie.
Fun fact: Noel Fielding has now done more episodes of Channel 4 Bake Off than Mel and Sue did with BBC Bake Off.
Wild, in all honesty.
No, your ears (or subtitles) aren’t fooling you.
Dan really just said “are you having a tin bath?”
It has been evident the whole series the love that Josh has for his late Nan, who motivated him to apply for Bake Off in the first place.
Josh’s mum: “He’s done it and he’s got to the final. And I can’t believe it.”
What is particularly evident with all of the finalists this year is how they have talked about lacking self-confidence, yet they all made it to the final.
A necessary reminder of how the way we think of ourselves is not how other people see us.
OK now I understand why the icing sugar is so crucial. They make them crisper.
But Dan is checking/yelling at the other contestants at their workstations to see how their progress is going, on standby in case they need help. What a hero.
Dan: “It’s do or die now.”
Dan, these are eclairs.
Matty’s partner Lara: “I don’t know when the penny has dropped that he’s good at baking.”
Matty, let us all here remind you. You’re in the Bake Off final.
The FINAL of The Great British Bake Off.
Josh has said that he cannot incorporate any more of his own fruit or vegetables into his bakes because he has used them all.
But he is incorporating a mango 🥭, which I didn’t realise until now is also an emoji 🥭🥭🥭.
Dan is making a strawberries and summer fruit punch jelly eclair, and for his second one he is baking an eclair with salted caramel mascarpone cream.
This is … reasonably normal? I’m now worried for him.
Dan is wearing four pairs of underwear, because it gives him good luck.
And for the life of me, he does not make it obvious whether he is joking or not.
The signature challenge is to make eight eclairs.
They need two different types and flavours.
“Remember guys this is the final. So the judges would like you to bake in the nude,” says Noel.
“I’m the underdog. Everyone likes an underdog, right?”
Matty, have you looked at gay Twitter?
I love how not dusting an eclair could be a dramatic cliffhanger.
That is why I will miss writing about this show.
The entire of Bake Off 2023 [according to that montage]:
Saku receives a hug and Prue says “so tell us about your beaver.”
Sounds about right.
I will never forget Rahul’s face during this.
Also, can we talk about how there have been 10 weeks of Bake Off? It flew by.
Thank you for making it so much fun.
Before the finale kicks off let’s have a look at the final three.
Josh: There have been multiple times this series where I have simply wondered how Josh has managed to pull it off. I mean, did you see his Christmas buffet party display showstopper a couple of weeks ago? It was a thing of wonder, like window display in a Parisian bakery good. He is the one to beat in the final, I reckon.
Dan: Thai green curry crème caramel anyone? Some of Dan’s baking ideas have divided opinion, and the number of times he has dropped a wired rack while putting something into the oven has been impossible to count, but he’s such a bloody great baker you hardly care. Dan deserves to be in the final because his creativity is unmatched, but he’s also so encouraging and helpful to all the other bakers. Let’s all get him a pint after this.
Matty: He curdled his buttercream three times during cake week, and uttered the highly relatable line “I’m hiding the terror through the smiles.” There have been many times that we have all thought Matty was a goner, but not only has he sailed into each new week, he’s massively improved and could actually win this thing. He would have played an absolute blinder if he did.
⭐STAR BAKER⭐ WATCH: all of the bakers have won Star Baker twice and a technical at least once. Dan came first in the technical during cake, chocolate and pastry week. And Josh won patisserie week.
Even if you take into consideration the technical challenge standings, I’m splitting hairs, because the technicals don’t matter that much. There’s hardly anything between the final three.
Welcome babes to the Guardian’s Bake Off liveblog. And it’s the final!
And it’s an all-male final too, the first time that has happened since series three (when the show was on BBC Two.)
We sadly said goodbye to Tasha (and Darryl) during patisserie week, on her birthday no less, but it also felt like the right decision. The final three all happen to be the strongest bakers this year. That’s right, Prue and Paul haven’t kicked out the wrong people this year even though I would have paid good money for a Saku, Rowan and Dana final. I think we all would.
And credit where it is due. This has been a much better series of Bake Off than last year. The show has listened to its audience. Alison has been a delight in the tent, and the back to basics approach with the challenges have worked wonders. The only downside of this series have been some of the technicals. The less we say about that steamed buns challenge the better.
