The Celebrity Traitors review – this star-packed bonanza is all you’ll be able to care about

‘It is a bit easier to keep track of those first-round contestants because they are all familiar faces’ … BBC’s The Celebrity Traitors. Photograph: BBC/Studio Lambert/Euan Cherry

This review, being a review and all, contains information on a programme that has already been on television – specifically, the first episode of The Celebrity Traitors. If you have not seen the first episode of The Celebrity Traitors and do not want to read information about the first episode of The Celebrity Traitors then please! Look away now.

I’m sorry to have to labour the point but every critic had to sign the Official Secrets Act before screeners were released to us and I am racked with paranoia. Which is the ideal state in which to approach any series of The Traitors, of course, so well-played, BBC marketing/psyops team.