I have a confession to make: I am not cute when I go to sleep. I’ll own up to this with full acknowledgement that I have lived with boyfriends who have seen me in my full, ugly-to-bed glory. And when my car needs to be moved for alternate side parking day, I roll out of bed at the crack of dawn, looking fifty shades of rough for all my neighbors to witness. I do. not. care. Why? Because the things I do at night, all of which leave me hitting the pillow looking like a gremlin, ultimately result in softer, smoother, brighter skin; with teeth that are straight (I spent a lot of time with Invisalign and I’m not wasting the investment) and second-day hair that is barely in need of a touch up. I know that TikTok has gotten a hold of the “go to bed ugly” trend, but baby, I’ve been committed to this lifestyle since I was 16 years old. It’s me and my ratty concert tees—and oodles of skincare—against the world.
Don’t get me wrong, I admire anyone who wishes to tuck in looking like a Disney princess—props to you, my dears. But my skin and hair aren’t exactly low-maintenance, nor are my standards, so I’d much rather throw my vanity out the window when I’m sleeping and wake up feeling and looking better than the previous eight hours (after the requisite morning shed, of course). Again, even if you live with somebody who you hope finds you attractive and desirable, fear not—the good ones will understand. Also, who cares!? You’re asleep. Let your products do the work while you get some much-deserved shut-eye.
