They say the five stages of grief include denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance spread out over time. But for the Sydney Swans, it must all come at once.
With less than five minutes until full-time, Damien Cutcliffe was wheeling between the different stages in quick succession.
The Sydney Swans were down by more than 50 points, and with the fourth straight loss in a grand final certain since the third quarter, the Swans fan looked to the heavens.
“This is the worst,” said Cutcliffe. “I honestly feel a bit delirious, it’s been painful since to watch in the second half. I just can’t believe we’re here again.”
The AFL Footy festival fan site in Marrickville in Sydney’s inner west had begun the day boisterously, a quiet confidence hanging over the overwhelming number of Sydney supporters.
But as the day unfolded, and the Brisbane Lions flexed their muscles, thumping in more than 11 goals in the second quarter and running away with the grand final, a despondency fell over the crowd.
Cutcliffe had watched his beloved Swans get thumped in their past three grand finals, but believed this was their nadir.
“This is the worst of the chocker threepeat we now have. The worst, by far. It has been like a wake over here, we all feel a bit lost.”
Fans winced in pain as the Lions kicked goal after goal, and the energy slowly drained from the venue in torturous fashion.
Fans had turned up to Henson Park in great numbers, picnic chairs and umbrellas in hand, cheeseboards and craft beers aloft, in typical Sydney fashion.
And with the Swans winning the minor premiership and spending the season atop the ladder, there was a sense early that this year would be the year they reversed a series of devastating grand final losses.
Daniel Lund plays for local club the Balmain Tigers, and sitting on his esky, he could not hide his devastation.
“No passion, no energy, nothing. I thought it would be our day today, I thought it would happen. But we are resigned to defeat again.”
“We’re used to it now, this is our third smashing in a row. Couldn’t tell you which of those has been the worst though.”
The Swans lost their last grand final in 2022 to Geelong by 81 points, lost in 2016 to the Western Bulldogs by 22 points and in 2014 to Hawthorne by 63 points.
And while the Swans started this match competitively, the mood, much like the weather, began turning in the second quarter.
It began raining just before half-time, a half-hearted shower, as though the rain had only chosen Henson park to rain over.
And while the weather, like the club, betrayed Sydney’s reputation for turning it on for the big occasions, much of the crowd braved the elements in the hopes of a second half comeback.
But the Swans couldn’t pull it together, resisting incessant screaming directed at the large screens by men with cans in hand.
“Its been a disgrace,” said Michael Neman, his frustration constantly boiling over.
His friend, Tom McHugh, was equally frustrated, calling on Swans coach John Longmire to resign.
“We can’t win a grand final under him, and its been my opinion for a while that he should go.”
“Like everyone here, I just feel so dejected and disappointed. We’ve had such a good season and to go out like, not even with a whimper, it’s bloody disappointing.”
He said it was one of the worst grand final losses because the Swans “should have easily won this”.
“We played way, way within ourselves today; we looked like a different team.”