Are there hundreds of contestants and are they virtually indistinguishable from each other at first sight? Yes! Is it noisy? Yes! Can you feel it encouraging appetites and urges – voyeurism, schadenfreude, extreme emotional investment in strangers – that a responsible citizen and society should strive neither to serve nor encourage? Oh yes! Is that done by forcing relationships then putting them under outre stressors, including unexpected toilet conditions, on an otherwise paradisiacal island? Yes! And is it at least nominally presented by Davina McCall, though actual sight of her is limited to a few opening minutes of the first episode and it is increasingly cheeky to bill her as a presence? Yes, yes to all of the above. Welcome to your next addictive reality show, 12 hour-long episodes designed to transition you comfortably into the autumn schedules – Stranded on Honeymoon Island.
It is Love Island meets Married at First Sight, if – and you will have to strain your imaginations here – the contestants on Love Island weren’t often instantly awful. This lot are, in the main, rather gorgeously endearing. I hadn’t realised how ready I was for a show that didn’t require me to bring my best loathing game. I find I have so much energy for the rest of the day.
