It's been a bitter pill to swallow for Sean Goss. Literally.
After years of being devoid of energy and unable to digest food - one half of a paracetamol tablet was the last straw.
When it lodged at the back of his throat, causing him to choke, he and the QPR doctor knew something wasn’t right.
After a year of investigating, he was diagnosed with eosinophilic oesophagitis.
Most of us couldn’t even spell it but after suffering the consequences of the condition - it now rolls off the Motherwell midfielder’s tongue.
Coming through the ranks at Manchester United and during a loan spell at Rangers, Goss was knackered after every training session.
To eat, he needed a LITRE of water with his meal to get it down.
That led to him feeling embarrassed in front of team-mates and forced him to miss family dinners.
Without being able to refuel his body, Goss wasn’t at his best on the pitch.
And it’s only now that he realises just how much the illness affected him.
He’s currently in remission after an operation in the summer but is still on medication to keep it under control.
The 26-year-old doesn’t know whether things might have been different at Old Trafford or Ibrox if he’d known about the condition.
He’s just thankful that he’s now fitter, stronger and eating well which has led to him becoming an integral part of Graham Alexander ’s side at Fir Park.
As he prepared to face Rangers this afternoon, Goss opened up on the problems he’s had to overcome.
He said: “I think it definitely held me back.
“I had weight loss, I was feeling tired all the time. And that was making me get injured.
“I was missing out on meals, swapping them for protein shakes.
“But I can feel a difference now. I’m slowly putting weight back on after having the operation.
“Every day I can feel a change in my body. I’ve got more life about me.
“After training, I’m not shattered when I get home. I don’t need to have a four hour nap.
“So hopefully, I can kick on from here.
“I literally couldn’t swallow my food.
“At a team meal, I’d be thinking: ‘I hope I don’t choke here’. I didn’t want to make a scene in front of everyone.
“It was really tough and it’s hard to explain unless you’ve had it.
“The fear of choking after you’ve been in hospital with it is quite scary.
“My mum would tell me to go home on a Sunday for a roast dinner.
“But I’d still be sitting there an hour and a half later and it was stone cold. By that time, you’re not interested in food.
“It’s called eosinophilic oesophagitis and I was struggling for a few years with it.
“But because it isn’t well known, I didn’t know where to go.
“It was only when I had a headache one day at QPR, I got two paracetamol, cut them in half and one of them lodged at the back of my throat.
“That’s when we knew I had to get it sorted. But it took me over a year to find out what it was after seeing different people.
“My mum said I had a few incidents when I was younger but it was when I got to 19 or 20 when I got it really bad.
“I had it every day but tried to live with it.”
Goss couldn’t go to restaurants and have a normal meal with friends or family.
Instead, any food he ate at home would need to be blitzed so he could get it down.
He said: “When I went out I’d try to avoid steak or chicken, I’d go for softer foods like fish.
“At home, a lot of the time I’d put protein into the nutri-bullet. I’d eat stuff like peanut butter because it’s high in calories.
“Now, I can’t stop eating. I’ll probably need the condition back at some point!
“It’s great to eat for pleasure now. When I had the op and went home, my family were saying it was like I’d never eaten before.
“I was shovelling everything in front of me. But eating is a part of your social life so it’s good to enjoy that again.
“I was always worried about making a scene so I’d need a litre bottle of water beside me.
“Basically, with every swallow I’d need to have a sip. If I got to my third sip and it wasn’t going down I knew I’d need to get to the hospital.
“You need to refuel your body to recover after games or training and I just couldn’t do it.”
Surgery on his oesophagus looks to have finally solved the problem and Goss is thriving in Lanarkshire.
And as he geared up for a return to Ibrox, he says he’s only going to get better now that he’s fit and healthy.
He said: “I had a dilation in the summer. They put a balloon down my throat to stretch my oesophagus.
“Previously, I’d get home from training, close the curtains, sleep, try and have a bit of dinner then go back to sleep again.
“It definitely affected me and I had it at Rangers when I was there.
“It was something I kept to myself. I’d have a bit of banter with the lads about how slow I was eating.
“But I’d be first in the canteen and last out.
“Now, I’d like to think it will help my career that I’m fully fit.
“Playing games every week will help build confidence within myself.
“I put myself about a bit more now and the main thing is to build it up every week and see where I can go from here.”
