Rosie Batty has been talking about family violence since 2014, which is when her only son, Luke, was murdered by his father at a cricket match.
With no experience being in the public eye, the single mother learned fast who to trust in the media and who to avoid. During her 12 months as the Australian of the Year in 2015, she spoke in public about the culture of violence 300 times.
Seven years later, Batty is joining the ranks of the media, asking other accidental heroes to open up on a new series of the ABC’s interview show One Plus One.
“When Luke first got killed, I think you’re in shock, and there’s a whole stack of media and you just talk to anybody,” Batty said ahead of Thursday’s One Plus One launch.
“And then you start to recognise some really stupid questions and you could feel your irritation and impatience start to come in. And you think, you know what? I really need to really be mindful of who I am speaking to.”
Batty’s advocacy and bravery, driven by the horrific circumstances of her 11-year-old son’s death, forced governments to seriously rethink their approach to tackling family violence and made her a household name.
Her most bruising media experience came early on when she found herself listening through an earpiece to comments made on TV by News Corp Australia columnist Joe Hildebrand, who said there was no excuse for not reporting child abuse.
Waiting in the wings to talk about her fundraising efforts, Batty was asked by Studio 10 producers to respond to Hildebrand live on air.
“I just heard victim-blaming statements and I was so, so angry,” Batty says now. She came on via a live cross and said: “This is beyond my comprehension that again the woman who’s the victim is punished.” She told Hildebrand he was “so misguided”.
“I came off air thinking, oh my God, what did I do? I’m really embarrassed that I’d been so angry.”
Hildebrand later apologised for upsetting Batty but did not resile from insisting women should report their partners for child abuse.
So when Karl Stefanovic’s ill-fated panel show The Verdict came calling years later Batty just laughed. They wanted her to be on a panel with Mark Latham who had criticised her publicly.
“Karl invited me on and I thought – don’t be so pathetic. I just couldn’t be bothered. I think I learned a long time ago to let other people have those divisive conversations. I learned how to pick my times to speak.”
It wasn’t the media attention that wore Batty down, so much as the persistent pleas for help from members of the public who were facing family violence.
“One of the most overwhelming parts that you can’t sustain is people reaching out to you in crisis with some really horrific stories which you can’t really fix and you can’t necessarily save or intervene,” she says.
“Concerned parents, grandmothers or family members reaching out to me as if I would have another suggestion of what they can do. And at end of the day, as imperfect as the system we have is, it is what we have.”
Batty says hosting One Plus One is a “good fit” for her because she genuinely loves talking to people.
“I’m not trying to be Stan Grant, I am just trying to give people the space and time they need and know when to relate and join in with a comment.”
The series kicks off on Thursday with another former Australian of the Year, Richard “Harry” Harris, who helped rescue the boys’ soccer team stuck in a Thai cave, and includes comedian Hannah Gadsby, writer and artist Amani Haydar, cook and food writer Stephanie Alexander, performer and domestic violence campaigner Russell Vickery and Frances Rings, the incoming artistic director of Bangarra Dance Theatre.
She will also be talking to gun control advocate Walter Mikac, who lost his wife and two children in the massacre at Port Arthur. “If anyone would understand my pain and my journey, it would be him,” Batty says.
So, has all the talking made any difference, five years on from the Victorian royal commission into family violence?
“If you lodge a breach of an intervention order with Victoria police now it is much more likely to be taken seriously,” she says.
“We have improved enormously from previous generations when family violence was seen as an interruption to police business. What keeps me motivated to keep going is when you look back you can see that you are constantly moving forward. It doesn’t feel like that at the time but you are.”
One Plus One starts Thursday 24 February at 9.30pm on ABC.