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Louise Thomas
Editor
Robbie Williams has complained about an unexpected drawback of his brand new teeth.
The 50-year-old was forced to have a fresh set installed after he “absolutely abused them” for three decades, over which he used cocaine, drank espressos, and admitted to not brushing his teeth enough.
Although the singer was impressed with his temporary replacements, it has come at the cost of one of his biggest joys.
“Now ever since I can remember I’ve bitten my nails,” he said in a post on Instagram. “I love it. Biting the nail then chewing it. My new teeth have no nerve endings. Also, my new teeth can’t bite into the nail.
“With no nerve endings comes no texture joy from my favourite calorie-free nibble. So I guess that’s gone then.”
Over the weekend, the “Angels” musician shared a picture of himself posing with his new teeth alongside an explanation of how they came about.
“So yesterday I went for a consultation for my new teeth,” he wrote. “That’s what I thought I was doing. Imagine my surprise when I came out with a full set of brand-new teeth. At least the temporary ones before the individual ones are placed in a month or so. I f***ing love them.”
In a tribute to his long-suffering real teeth, he wrote: “They served me well, but I absolutely abused them. Opening bottles with them. Espresso staining them. Rubbing coke on them. Not brushing them properly. Clenching them for three whole decades.”
He also joked about his “free-semi-relapse” from the three hours of laughing gas that was used in the procedure, and concluded: “Anyway, these are my new teeth for a while. Maybe a few of you were fond of the old ones. THEY WERE F****D.
“We’ve been through a lot together. But now it’s time to move on. Goodbye my little nubby-yellow-friends.”
Williams also revealed that he had renewed his wedding vows to wife Ayda Field for a second time.
“I feel confident and I’m experiencing a new vitality that I’ve been missing. I got a new smile. I got a new pink jacket. I played in the pool. I ate some crap and it was lovely crap. I wrote and recorded two new songs,” he wrote.
“Oh, Me and Ayda renewed our vows,” he added alongside a smiley face emoji.
He added: “I am very very very grateful. I’m grateful right now. I’m not in the future, tired and stressed. I’m right here right now grateful.”
