One of Roald Dahl’s best-known characters was the Enormous Crocodile, “a horrid greedy grumptious brute” who “wants to eat something juicy and delicious”.
Now a conversation the author had 40 years ago has come to light, revealing that he was so appalled by the idea that publishers might one day censor his work that he threatened to send the crocodile “to gobble them up”.
The conversation took place in 1982 at Dahl’s home in Great Missenden, Buckinghamshire, where he was talking to the artist Francis Bacon.
“I’ve warned my publishers that if they later on so much as change a single comma in one of my books, they will never see another word from me. Never! Ever!” he said.
With his typically evocative language, he added: “When I am gone, if that happens, then I’ll wish mighty Thor knocks very hard on their heads with his Mjolnir. Or I will send along the ‘enormous crocodile’ to gobble them up.”
He was referring to his Norwegian roots and to his earlier story of “the greediest croc” in talking to Bacon, who apparently felt just as strongly about the subject, telling him: “There must be no changes to an artist’s original work when he is dead for any reason whatsoever.” Crossing himself in jest, Dahl replied: “I just hope to God that will never happen to any of my writings as I am lying comfortably in my Viking grave.”
The conversation was recorded, with permission from both men, by Barry Joule, who had accompanied his friend Bacon to spend a weekend with the writer.
Dahl, who died in 1990 aged 74, was one of the most successful children’s authors of all time. But his publisher, Puffin, caused controversy this month for hiring “sensitivity readers” to rewrite his books with hundreds of revisions so that they “can continue to be enjoyed by all today”.
In the new edition of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Augustus Gloop – a glutton for chocolate – is now just “enormous” rather than “enormously fat”; in The Twits, Mrs Twit is no longer “ugly and beastly”, just “beastly”, and in The Enormous Crocodile, “we eat little boys and girls” has been changed to “we eat little children”.
Salman Rushdie, the Booker prize-winning novelist, is among many who have condemned such censorship as “absurd”, while Puffin has been reportedly inundated with complaints from the public.
On Thursday, Camilla, the queen consort, appeared to weigh in on the debate. At a Clarence House reception for her online book club, she told authors: “Please remain true to your calling, unimpeded by those who may wish to curb the freedom of your expression or impose limits on your imagination.”
Responding to the criticism, the publishers announced on Friday that they will publish both the original texts and reworked editions.
Recalling the 1982 weekend, Joule said that both Dahl and Bacon were “pleasantly oiled with drink and in a good mood”, and that talk of “red-line postmortem changes to any artist’s work” sparked loud and passionate debate.
He said that Dahl was “banging his fist down so hard all the glasses shook and wine spilled” and Bacon thumped his wine glass down with such force that “I thought he would break it”.
The weekend followed the publication of Dahl’s now-classic Revolting Rhymes, and Joule recalled that he and Bacon were presented with copies.
He said: “Fully puffed up on the subject, [Dahl] informed us, ‘You know, it was Marx and Lenin who commenced this political correctness rubbish way back in 1917, and by God it’s creeping into this country.’
“He suddenly grabbed my copy and roughly flipped thorough several pages to where the right-hand side featured a fine comical drawing by Quentin Blake of Miss Red Riding Hood wearing a heavy wolfskin coat. ‘For instance, look here – knickers!’ he exclaimed [at the line ‘She whips a pistol from her knickers’] and pressed his forefinger fingernail under the eight letters so hard an imprint was left behind … noting, ‘I suppose if the Political Correctness Police could get ahold of that, they’d change in an instant the filthy word to “ladies underwear apparel”!’ Francis frowned, then grinned widely at such an outrageous possibility.”
Joule had regularly recorded his conversations with Bacon, and over that 1982 weekend Dahl also agreed to a tape recorder being turned on. Luckily, Joule also transcribed the conversation because the recording was inadvertently destroyed soon afterwards.
He recalled that it was also the weekend when Bacon was amazed to discover Dahl was one of his earliest collectors, at a time when the artist was still struggling in the 1940s and 50s: “The surprised painter noted in a soft earnest voice, looking straight at the writer, ‘I knew there was someone out there buying my early pieces, but I had no idea it was you.’ You could not help but be deeply moved by the import of this special occasion.”
