Liz Truss's Cabinet hokey-cokey will hand tens of thousands in payoffs to ministers who spent just 49 days in or out of government.
Five Cabinet ministers are set to trouser golden goodbyes for career changes shorter than the 90-day B&Q returns policy.
Grant Shapps, Dominic Raab, Steve Barclay and Johnny Mercer were sacked by Liz Truss in September and rehired this week by Rishi Sunak.