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The Independent UK
The Independent UK
Lifestyle
Ellie Muir

Richard E Grant reflects on ‘complicated gratitude’ for mother as he announces her death aged 93

Twitter @RichardEGrant

Richard E Grant has announced that his mother, Leonne Esterhuysen, has died aged 93.

The British actor, 66, shared a tribute on Twitter, detailing their “incredibly complicated relationship” as he processed her death.

The Withnail and I star explained that he learnt of his mother’s death after receiving eight missed calls and knew “immediately” what had happened.

Speaking in his tribute video shared on Thursday (20 July), Grant told his followers: “We had an incredibly complicated relationship. And she’ll be somebody that was to me, anyway, emotionally withdrawn and withheld her approbation or approval of anything. So nothing was quite good enough.”

​​”But what that proved to be is a great motor for ambition and determination to try and prove yourself and be the best that you possibly can.”

“And yet, ironically, whatever she did, she demanded and got applause and approval from everybody around her, including me.”

The actor then explained that he had stayed with his mother six weeks after the death of his wife Joan Washington, who died from lung cancer in 2021 aged 71.

He continued: “[My mother] sent me a very terse email at the end of the trip saying, ‘I regret to say this was an absolute disaster. We only have two things in common, books and classical music.’”

“So whereas she was very physically untactile. I’ve gone the opposite extreme, so a very loving father and husband, I suppose, in response to that.”

Grant concluded: “Do I feel sadness that she has died? I feel resignation more than anything. But most of all, gratitude for having given me life.”

After the death of Grant’s wife, the actor has been opening up about his experience of grief.

His memoir, A Pocketful of Happiness, recounts the events of Grant’s life and career, told through letters that Washington had sent him throughout their courtship and subsequent 35-year marriage.

Speaking to The Independent in May, Grant said that he still has silent conversations with his late wife.

“I don’t talk out loud [to her], but after 38 years together I know I can anticipate or predict what her response to whatever’s happening in my day would be,” he said.

“So I have a silent conversation with her, especially at the steering wheel at the end of a day, or at the end of a show... cross-reference what she would be thinking.”

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