Director Michael Bay’s “Ambulance” celebrates Los Angeles as a shining city build on a cloverleaf of speed, concrete, yelling, automatic gunfire (sorry, pal, not in the mood) and rugged American individualism on both sides of the law. At weird intervals the action cuts away to a fluttering faceful of U.S. flag, as a reminder of where we are and who we are, and what the movie’s selling: national pride in a certain kind of mediocre action picture.
None of the collisions, Gatling gun massacres (again, not in the mood) or SWAT sniper stare-downs in “Ambulance” can compete with Jake Gyllenhaal’s popeyed, this-guy-goes-to-11 dramatics in the role of the turtlenecked bank robber under pressure, a character whose heist management style tends toward hammering repetition of simple commands. There are many, many scenes in “Ambulance” where Gyllenhaal tightens the screws on someone to hurry up, and the dialogue defaults to variations on “Go. Will you go? Now!!! You have 45 seconds! GET GOING!!!” It’s like the Michael Bay version of Dr. Seuss’s “Marvin K. Mooney Will You Please Go Now!”
Without all the yakkity, “Ambulance” would very likely run about 80 minutes, not 136. The 2005 Danish film on which first-time feature film screenwriter Chris Fedak rebuild this vehicle ran, in fact, 80 minutes. That’s nearly an extra hour, or a lost one, depending on your enjoyment level.
