Rollin’ round Flipper’s, smokin’ Lost Marys, sippin’ on gin and juice. My god, I have only just recovered. Not because Dre and Snoop’s new drinks range is all that strong but because it was their first UK show in 30 years. Unfathomable icons. No seriously, the whole thing was absurd. Dr Dre and Snoop Dogg playing The Next Episode to a millennial crowd of just 500, everyone shouting the lyrics, standing on tables, dancing like they did when MTV (remember that?) came on at that legendary year 11 house party. Mine was the one where a lad from another school set the shed on fire and someone ordered 50 pizzas on their mum’s Amex.
And who expected Eminem to turn up to a west London roller disco and perform Forgot About Dre? Then Houdini from his new album? Nobody. Any millennial would lose their mind, and I did mine. It was delirium, a cacophony of madness; it wasn’t long before guests started hanging off host Shaquille O’Neal's big arms while lights flashed, drinks spilled, people poured up the stairs from the smoking area (no vaping inside really, don’t stress) past… Vernon Kay?
That guestlist, by the way. It was like a ticker-tape parade. Idris Elba chatting to Jude Bellingham was a moment. Anna Taylor Joy rocked up, then Jeremy Renner. Virgil van Dijk, Leigh-Anne Peacock, Ella Eyre and co. came too, though who on earth cares when we're all listening to Drop It Like It’s Hot and Nuthin’ But a G Thang. Honestly. The room could have been full of journalists and I wouldn’t have cared. Oh wait.
Yeah, so Gin & Juice, Dre and Snoop's product. I mean, it’s fine, it’s like a hard seltzer — 5.9 per cent abv, low in sugar, refreshing and crisp — and it comes in four flavours: apricot, citrus, melon, passion fruit. I tried one of each — all decent, the melon maybe the best of them. They didn’t help my attempts to roller skate because I have become far, far too tubby to move with any distinct panache, but I didn’t fall over in front of LeBron James, thank god. Or Tess Daly.
Out in the smoking area, I gathered my thoughts. Dr is 59 these days, Snoop 52. Eminem is pushing the same and now looks quite a lot like David Guest. I hope to see them all play again, whether they’re doing big PR or playing Wembley for a final hurrah. Sadly, there’s every chance I won’t. And so I am truly glad they decided to shimmy into branded booze. Every time I see it in Tesco I’ll remember that night at Flipper's. No sheds burning, sure, but absolute fire.
