Editors’ note: If you or someone you know is having thoughts of suicide or is in emotional distress, contact the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK(8255) or at suicidepreventionlifeline.org.
Tennis star Nick Kyrgios is opening up again about the mental health issues he dealt with during the 2019 season, saying he contemplated suicide during a time of personal struggles.
Kyrgios harmed himself that year, specifically on his arms, to the point that he had to wear sleeves to cover up his scars, he said in upcoming episodes of Netflix’s tennis docuseries Break Point.
“That pressure, having all eyes on you, the expectation, I couldn’t deal with it,” Kyrgios said in the show, via The Telegraph. “I hated the kind of person I was. I was drinking, abusing drugs, lost my relationship with my family, pushed all my close friends away.
“You could tell I was hurting. My whole arm was covered in scars—that’s why I actually got my arm sleeve, to cover it all. I was genuinely contemplating if I wanted to commit suicide.”
The Australian’s mental health continued to worsen as the 2019 season progressed. After losing to Rafael Nadal in the second round of Wimbledon in 2019, Kyrgios said he admitted himself into a psychiatric ward to get the help he needed.
“I lost at Wimbledon. I woke up, and my dad was just sitting next to me on the bed, and he was like full-blown crying,” Kyrgios said. “That was a bit [of a] wake-up call for me. I was like, O.K., I cannot keep doing this. I ended up in a psych ward in London to figure out my problems.”
Kyrgios discusses these topics during an episode that focuses on his reaching the Wimbledon final in 2022. He ended up losing to Novak Djokovic in four sets, but it was apparently the comeback Kyrgios needed. He won his first title in three years at the Citi Open soon after that.
The 28-year-old hasn’t played in any Grand Slam tournaments this year. He first withdrew from the Australian Open in January with a knee injury. He then withdrew from the French Open after he sustained a foot injury during a robbery that led to his mother being held at gunpoint. As of now, Kyrgios is expected to return for Wimbledon.
The new episodes of Break Point will be released on Wednesday, June 21.
