The penultimate week of the NFL season is now upon us (sad face), and Santa brought a lot of very nice gifts for some very good teams who are getting hot at the right time. That said, some of the league’s best found coal in their stockings in the form of a loss.
With the playoffs mere weeks away, here are how all 32 teams stack up from worst to best.
32. Carolina Panthers
Last Week: 32
It’s like watching a Wile E. Coyote cartoon every week with the Panthers. Anytime they think they have a master drive ahead of them, the dynamite blows up in their hands, and their opponent just says “meep meep” and runs along.
31. Washington Commanders
Last Week: 29
Giving up 17 first-quarter points to the Jets is almost impressive in its incompetence. This Commanders team is limping to the offseason.
30. New York Giants
Last Week: 31
Oh no, the Tommy Cutlets experience is over, he said sarcastically. Ride Tyrod Taylor for the final two weeks and try again on finding a quarterback this March and/or April.
29. New England Patriots
Last Week: 30
The Patriots aren’t a good football team, but they haven’t quit on each other or their head coach who is likely approaching his swan song game with the franchise.
28. Arizona Cardinals
Last Week: 27
There’s nothing really ground-breaking to say about the Cardinals. They aren’t good, and their season will be done in two weeks. Greg Dortch is fast, though.
27. Los Angeles Chargers
Last Week: 25
They made the Bills sweat, but this team has its eye on finding its next head coach and figuring out how to surround Justin Herbert with talented players.
26. New York Jets
Last Week: 26
Only the Jets could turn a 17-0 first-quarter lead into a game that comes down to a missed field goal at the gun.
25. Atlanta Falcons
Last Week: 27
Kyle Pitts scored a touchdown on Christmas Eve, so now we have to find the Grinch who stole Arthur Smith, because that is too suspicious.
24. Tennessee Titans
Last Week: 24
That was a heartbreaking way for the Titans to lose, but they have heart, and they embody what Mike Vrabel preaches in terms of their effort.
23. New Orleans Saints
Last Week: 21
Thursday was The Godfather of Derek Carr garbage-time stat-padding.
22. Chicago Bears
Last Week: 23
I don’t know if the Bears will hold onto Justin Fields, but with a good offensive coordinator, he will feed families.
21. Minnesota Vikings
Last Week: 19
You can’t start Nick Mullens again this week. Josh Dobbs’ magical rocket ride may have come down, but Mullens is far too careless with the ball. Minnesota still has playoff hopes, and they need to go with the safer quarterback to get there.
20. Pittsburgh Steelers
Last Week: 22
The Steelers found the best quarterback on their roster, and it isn’t Kenny Pickett. Mason Rudolph had the best statistical performance of any Steelers quarterback since 2019- he should start the rest of the way.
19. Las Vegas Raiders
Last Week: 20
The Raiders’ defense had Patrick Mahomes in hell. Consecutive drives with defensive touchdowns ended up being the difference as the Raiders defeated the Chiefs in a game that Aidan O’Connell didn’t complete a pass after the first quarter.
18. Indianapolis Colts
Last Week: 16
The Colts missed a golden opportunity to take the lead in the AFC South race. Now, even if they win out, the division isn’t a guarantee.
17. Green Bay Packers
Last Week: 18
No quarterback has more games with multiple touchdown passes and no interceptions than Jordan Love. They had a rough middle section of the season that may keep them out of the playoffs, but they have their quarterback. What they need is a new defensive coordinator.
16. Denver Broncos
Last Week: 14
The Broncos’ postseason hopes are all but gone after losing to the Patriots at home. At 7-8, they will need a lot of dominoes to fall their way.
15. Cincinnati Bengals
Last Week: 13
George Pickens and Mason Rudolph exposed the Bengals’ secondary. Three Jake Browning interceptions didn’t help matters, either.
14. Seattle Seahawks
Last Week: 15
Geno Smith and Drew Lock both having their Kemba Walker stepback jumper in the Big East Tournament moments in consecutive weeks is one of the best stories of the last month, and it may end up earning the Seahawks a playoff spot.
13. Jacksonville Jaguars
Last Week: 11
The Jaguars have lost their last four games, have only scored 19 points over their last two games, and Trevor Lawrence has eight turnovers in the last three weeks. Outside of that, they’re in great shape.
12. Tampa Bay Buccaneers
Last Week: 17
Baker Mayfield has eight touchdowns and no interceptions in the Bucs’ last three games, and Tampa Bay sits alone atop the NFC South.
11. Houston Texans
Last Week: 9
The Texans were dog-walked by Joe Flacco and Amari Cooper, who went off for over 200 yards receiving. They’ll need to win out and get some up to either get a wild card spot or win the division.
10. Los Angeles Rams
Last Week: 12
Matthew Stafford is playing some of the best football of his career, and the Rams are the hottest team in the NFC. Heaven have mercy on the division-winner that draws them in the wild card round because no one should want to play the Rams right now.
9. Cleveland Browns
Last Week: 10
To hell with it, give Joe Flacco the MVP award. Who says no? The Browns have won three straight with Flacco under center, and the Browns are all but guaranteed to clinch a playoff spot.
8. Dallas Cowboys
Last Week: 6
Dallas didn’t play a good complimentary game. The offense didn’t take full advantage of their scoring opportunities, and the defense let the offense down after they took a late lead. They’ll likely be the No. 5 seed in the NFC.
7. Kansas City Chiefs
Last Week: 5
The Chiefs’ offense is awful. The receivers, the offensive staff- this is brutal. And it’s a waste of an incredible defense.
6. Philadelphia Eagles
Last Week: 8
The Eagles won, but continue to shoot themselves in the feet and allow inferior teams to hang around. Something has felt off about them all season.
5. Detroit Lions
Last Week: 7
The Lions have won the NFC North for the first time, and it’s their first division title since 1993. Dan Campbell is certainly a candidate for Coach of the Year, and the fact that he accomplished this in just three seasons is incredible.
4. Miami Dolphins
Last Week: 5
The Dolphins got their signature win of the season, silencing all the critics saying they couldn’t beat good teams. They’ll have to beat another good team next week when they face the Ravens.
3. Buffalo Bills
Last Week: 3
Buffalo has won three straight games, and one more win will all but lock up a playoff spot. If they win next week, and if the Ravens defeat the Dolphins, Week 18 in Miami is for the division.
2. San Francisco 49ers
Last Week: 1
The 49ers got humbled at home by the Ravens. Let’s not overreact, though- they are still one of the league’s best and they’re probably going to be in the NFC Championship Game. Brock Purdy was bested by a great defense, and Baltimore took advantage of those mistakes.
1. Baltimore Ravens
Last Week: 1
The defense picked off Brock Purdy four times, and the offense took advantage of their opportunities. It’s hard to argue that Lamar Jackson isn’t the MVP right now. He is playing as well as he ever has, and the Ravens just defeated the best team in football and stole their crown. This Ravens team is different — they very well could win the Super Bowl.
