The end of 2022 is within reach and our last issue of the year is out already (in case you missed it, music legend Pharrell Williams closes us out). We’ve printed 44 issues of ES Magazine this year. That’s 44 cover stars (minus a concept cover or two) including Kate Moss, Jodie Comer, Anna Delvey, Chloë Sevigny, Fran Lebowitz, Bukayo Saka, Paloma Elsesser, Julia Fox, Isabelle Huppert, Jeff Goldblum and FKA Twigs - to name a handful.
44 issues also means 44 ‘My Londons’: the very back page of the magazine where we ask people to share their favourite London tips and tricks; where they go on a first date; the best meal they’ve ever eaten; what they’d do if they were mayor for the day; and, of course, where they’d most like to be buried in the city.
From those born and raised here - the likes of Loyle Carner, Big Zuu and Jaime Winston - to the Londoners in spirit, who hail from afar but hold the city close to their heart, Baz Luhrmann, Marc Jacobs and Fred Sirieix. Below, we round up the very best quotes of 2022.
Where would you most want to be buried?
“Just chuck ’em [my ashes] out of the bus window and wherever they land it’ll be fine. Maybe on Shoot-up Hill or Kilburn High Road, from the 16 or the 32.”
Have you ever had a run-in with a London police officer?
“‘Banished!’ was the headline in The London Paper. I wasn’t allowed to be in a London postcode between 7pm and 7am for about six months. That was the time when I was arrested so often, it’s not even funny. But the police found it quite funny. There was even a TV sketch about it — the punchline was, ‘Let’s go and nick Pete Doherty!’”
Where do you go to let your hair down?
“I can’t believe I pour my soul out to you and all you want to know is where the great pubs are! I definitely grow old disgracefully on the dance floor. I was at this club and there was a young crowd having a birthday party, I said ‘look away you don’t want to see this!’ I have a philosophy which is: dream in Paris, dance in Brazil, work in LA, get lost in Tokyo, live in New York but have fun in London.”
Most iconic Londoner?
“An Australian, actually. I’ve always had an enormous admiration for the time and the journey of Leigh Bowery. He would get up at 6am and spend two days getting ready to go out to the club. Because he saw not only club life as an art form, but himself as a piece of art.”
Best thing a cabbie has said to you?
“It was about 10 years ago. I was travelling with Howard Marks and the cabbie said to me, ‘This trip is free for you because you’re with Mr Nice.’”
Who was the best dressed Beatle and why?
“I think Paul [McCartney] was the sloppiest dresser, but he was kind of creative in his outfits”
Where would you most want to be buried?
“Buried!? F***ing hell. Where would I want to be buried!? Somewhere weird and funky, like in the middle of central, in Old Street, in Oxford Street. You know how they have the benches commemorating people? I don’t want a bench, I want a portion of the road that says ‘Big Zuu was buried here’. I’d wanna get shot, like Tupac. I don’t know how but I would love to go out like Tupac and have a legacy like him. That’s all I have to say.”
Where would you go on a first date?
“West London. Just the whole of west. I think Soho is also good for a first date; it’s busy, it’s popping, there’s so many things to talk about, just having a stroll round and getting some food — there’s so many types of food and bars. If you don’t like central London, I can’t date you.”
Best thing a cabbie has said to you?
“When I was shooting The Krays movie in 1990. The cabbie turned around and said, ‘Do you know where the Krays got their secret powers from? Their mum used to make them drink the water their greens were cooked in.’”
Where in London would you recommend for a first date?
“Our real first date was Ronnie Scott’s to watch Sade, who’d just come along with ‘Your Love is King’. Even today that’s our song. Everyone knows about our supposed first date at Camden Palace when George Michael came along and played third wheel. We spent all night trying to get rid of him.”
Who do you call to have fun?
“I call 020 8686 1122. It’s the number for Powerleague in Croydon. On my birthday or when I get a day off, I try and get my friends together for five-a-side. I’m a Liverpool fan and like to think I play like Trent Alexander-Arnold. A paintbrush of a right foot.”
Where would you most want to be buried?
“I’m more of a Viking funeral guy. Wrapped in cloth, doused in petrol, pushed out to sea, then shot with a flaming arrow.”
Where in London would you most like to be buried?
“I want my ashes to be sprinkled in the Thames — it can’t be any dirtier. With the amount of sewage that the water companies are allowing into our rivers, a few more ashes won’t make a difference.”
Have you ever had a run-in with a London police officer?
“I’ve never had a run-in with a cop, but I’ve had a few run-ins with stewards in football stadiums. I nearly got kicked out of Chelsea. I’m a Manchester United supporter and I think most people reading that will go, ‘Oh yeah, typical Man United supporter, living in London,’ but I’ve supported them since 1976. So I was at the Chelsea end at a game, and Man United scored and I got up, I couldn’t help myself. And within seconds a steward came up to me and said, ‘If you don’t shut up you’re out of here.’ And the same thing happened at Tottenham!”
What makes someone a Londoner?
“If you say ‘babes’. And you say ‘innit’ now and again. That’s London. And a true Londoner loves black cabs.”
Have you ever had a run-in with a London police officer?
“I have. No comment. I took the long route around what I was running away from, because I didn’t want to f*** up my Patrick Cox loafers. That’s why I got caught! I didn’t want to mess up my shoes, so I just sort of surrendered. White flag.”
Who do you call to have fun?
“Naomi Campbell, because you never know where you are going to end up. We were at The Twenty Two last fashion week and there was a party going on downstairs; we didn’t even know whose it was. The next thing I knew Naomi was DJing.”
What was your first flat like?
“The first flat I ever bought was with my Soft Cell royalties in Brewer St. Soho was quite a dark place at the time. Sex shops, Hard core Porno Cinemas, red light windows. Addicts, dealers, pimps. It was rough, dangerous at times.”
Do you think you’ll stay in London forever?
“London is like a lover. The initial love has been intense but in time its faded and those things you loved about them aren’t there any more. You’ll always be fond of them but time to move on.”
What do you mourn most about old Soho when you go there now?
“I don’t mourn anything . Over recent years I got nostalgic but now I don’t really care so much. The Soho I knew will never come back, it’s not mine anymore and cities have to evolve and change, Always amorphous.”
Most iconic Londoner in history?
“Joanna Kuchta, she’s the international party girl I love. She is a friend of mine and she’s also a model and influencer — she’s just like really cool to me. She has a really unique style. I met her through social media and she was really fun in person. She took me to a lot of parties and clubs, and she showed me a really fun time in London.”
What do you go to let your hair down?
“I’ve done my fair share of letting my hair down all over the world. From Studio 54 to [Kensington nightclub] Yours or Mine, it was mind-blowing. Now, I blow off steam in my garden and I think it is the best for everyone that I don’t get too excited.”
What would you do if you were Mayor of London for the day?
“I would get rid of these electric scooters and bikes on the roads. They are so frightening and dangerous. When I drive over Putney Bridge it’s like the Tour de France!”
Where is home?
“Home is… Do you want me to say London?I wish I could. Home is in Paris, where my hairless sphynx cat, Pixie, is, but also in Los Angeles, New York and Venice, where our factory is, and where we spend a lot of time.”
What’s your first memory of London?
“I remember being at Paddington station aged 12 or 13 and thinking it was huge. I was going to Wales as part of an exchange to learn English. I was alone, I don’t recall why, though someone was picking me up. When the son of the family I was staying with arrived to collect me, it turned out he was a trainspotter. So every time we got to a crossing or a station, he would tell me what trains we were going to pass. It was the oddest thing ever; but also spoke volumes about the English spirit.”
Best thing you’ve ever eaten here?
“I don’t know because I don’t eat many sausages or chicken pot pies!”
What’s your London secret?
“I don’t have one. I’ve got no secrets, I’m an open book!”
What’s your first memory of London?
“I’m so old now and I’ve lost my mind, so I don’t really remember very much. I can’t remember the first I came to London. I remember my first time to Paris, but I didn’t come to London that time… oh yes I did! It was in the Eighties, around the time of Stephen Linard. It was a really great time in London’s creativity and young designers and stuff.”
Who do you call when you want to have fun?
“Fruitcake is a good call, she is always fun. If only you knew. I also have some very good friends. The other night I was out with Gino [D’Acampo] and I’m not going to say it was a mistake, but it was… if you know what I mean, it was just mad. Whenever I’m with him we just have such a good time.”
Ever had a run-in with a London police officer?
“I did spend a night in the nick. In the early Seventies, I’d been drinking too much and they slung me in the cells. I was retrieved by my lawyer, who was also drunk because I’d been with him at lunch.”
What do London cabbies say to you?
“You can always have a good chat to a cockney cabbie. They always want to talk about A Clockwork Orange. You don’t even mind the odd traffic jam because you’re being entertained royally.”
What’s your London secret?
“I don’t wish to be looked at as a relic from the Eighties. Yes, I was part of it here, but my thing was always, ‘what’s next?’ When people are like ‘wasn’t it better when we were young?’ I hate it! Whatever is round the corner is what’s better. I’m not into dwelling. Fun party time is what’s on next week, thanks.”
Who is the most iconic Londoner?
“I was up on stage with the Sex Pistols when they began, dancing and introducing them. They’d go into Vivienne Westwood in 1973 and had a member called David Harrison, who I was friendly with. One day they booted him out, I suppose he was too camp for their image. I said to Malcolm [McLaren], ‘Do you think I should audition?’ I was 23. He said, ‘You’re too old!’ Then they got Johnny Rotten. Malcolm and Vivienne brought him to my father’s house and from that day on we went everywhere together, along with Billy Idol, Siouxsie Sioux, that lot. I’d get them into clubs.”
What is your first memory of London?
“Arriving at Victoria station in about 1982. I had come from France, where I thought I could get a job in Paris, but it turns out I couldn’t. I knew some people who lived in London, so I thought I’d go find them. My main memory of that time was being on buses and coming around corners to see things like Trafalgar Square and Westminster Abbey and just thinking: what, this is it?! My Irish imagination had made them massive. I remember being really underwhelmed by it all.”
Where do you stay in London?
“I’ve been here so rarely. Where are we now? The Corinthia hotel — so here!”
