My depression felt creatively expansive. Now I’ve overcome it, how do I keep the meaningful parts?

‘Depression is lying when it tells us that darkness is a guide to depth,’ Eleanor Gordon-Smith writes. ‘Love, joy, relief, reflection, awe at nature and awareness of contingency can also oxygenate your creative blood.’ Painting: Twilight 1910 by Evelyn De Morgan. Photograph: Alamy

I’ve overcome a depression that was both debilitating and strangely vivid and creatively expansive. How do I step back into ordinary life without losing the parts that felt meaningful and alive?

During that time, I immersed myself in creative work, I was writing poetry, painting my feelings and reading books that echoed my inner world, and I found a depth that felt honest, vivid and alive. I gravitated towards art and film that explored life’s darker edges and through them I gained a perspective that felt richer and more truthful than everyday chatter. Those pursuits became my comfort and my way of making sense of things.