Not many franchises have been rebooted more often than the Texas Chainsaw Massacre - and its timeline is more fractured than my jaw would be if I stepped into the ring with Tyson Fury.
This time Netflix takes a turn at resurrecting Leatherface (played on this occasion by Mark Burnham) and choose to set its flick nearly 50 years after the horrifying events of the seminal original.
David Blue Garcia directs only his second movie but the story was penned by the Don’t Breathe films’ scribes Fede Alvarez and Rodo Sayagues.
As fittingly described in the new Scream outing, Texas Chainsaw 2022 is a “requel”, with a cast of young newbies joining a few core “legacy” characters.
The latter group includes the returning Sally (Olwen Fouéré), the only survivor of Leatherface’s 1974 killing spree.
However, her presence just feels like a retread of Jamie Lee Curtis’ story arc in the new Halloween movies that should mean something but doesn’t amount to much; and after what she went through, would Sally still be living in Texas, never mind be gutting pigs in a barn?
Burnham’s “old man” Leatherface isn’t overly intimidating either and the script’s efforts to shoehorn in gun control, racism and cancel culture ring hollow; and partnering these big issues with dumb character decisions like hiding in a closet and opening a door to investigate when you’ve just been told a killer is on the loose doesn’t work.
None of the cast are particularly bad but they don’t stand out either and the film only really shines with what many horror buffs will be satisfied with - its gory kills.
A snapped bone is used as a weapon, a very nasty facial wound chills and there’s Misery -like treatment to someone’s ankle with a mallet.
A neon-lit party bus bloodbath is the visceral highlight, while neat shots used by Garcia include Leatherface rising out of a cornfield, a storm on the horizon as the maniac heads to town and his chainsaw acting like Jaws’ fin.
Texas Chainsaw Massacre 2022 is short and should resonate with gore hounds, but otherwise its spluttering scares make it feel like time for Leatherface to power down his iconic weapon.
● Pop me an email at ian.bunting@reachplc.com and I will pass on any movie or TV show recommendations you have to your fellow readers.
● Texas Chainsaw Massacre is screening now on Netflix.
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